The Reason I Keep Weighing

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It was a great week! I coupled an hour of cardio with 45 minutes of weight training with Trainer Tina twice that week. I had also done at least an hour of cardio 3 more times, hitting my goal of exercising 5 times that week. But that’s not all! I felt great about my eating that week. Whole grains, fruit, vegetables, lean meats were in abundance. But more than anything, I felt great about my obedience to the Lord. I started my days spending quality time with Him, which seemed to fuel my times of coming to Him when I was tempted and feeling empowered to resist. Needless to say, when I woke for my weekly weigh-in Tuesday morning September 6th, I was expecting so see a good number. Still, I ran through my mental checklist of my week, as I do each time I weigh: Did I exercise regularly? Yep! Did I eat healthily? Absolutely! Did I turn to God rather than food consistently? I did! So regardless of what the number on the scale said, I felt great! Then I recited a line from one of my favorite books, Made to Crave, by Lysa Terkeurst,  “I am a Jesus-girl who can step on a scale and simply see an indication of how much my body weighs, not the worth of who I am”! And I believe that with all my heart! So now I was ready to weigh. I stepped on the scale (halfway expecting to see at least a 2lbs loss), blinked my eyes, stepped off the scale, cleared the number, and stepped on again. Surely there was a glitch. But no. No glitch. I saw it right the first time. I hadn’t lost 2lbs. I had GAINED .2 of a pound! I chuckled to myself. Honestly, I felt great about my week so that .2 didn’t really bother me all that much. Besides, I had just gotten of my menstrual cycle (sorry boys) the day before and could still be retaining quite a bit of water. But more than that, Trainer Tina had tried to kill me with weights that week and I was confident that the additional .2 was an increase of of muscle, which I knew weighed more than fat. I was certain that when I weighed the next week I would see a dramatic drop, which had happened many times in the past.

Unfortunately, my week didn’t exactly go as planned though. I left that very day for New York and while there I gave into several foods that were not a part of my healthy eating plan. Then I traveled to California and once again chose foods that I knew weren’t the healthiest options. Some of those moments were simply bad choices, others were a result of emotional meltdowns where I turned to food rather than God. Still, it wasn’t a total loss. I did a lot of walking in New York and at Disneyland in CA (which I refer to as “lifestyle fitness”). I also put in 2 additional times in the gym. That coupled with my expected drop from last week’s disappointing weigh in made me think that when I stepped on the scale this morning I could still see either a loss or a similar number to last week. I ran through my mental checklist. Did I exercise regularly? Well, no. Did I eat healthily? Uh-uh. Did I turn to God rather than food  consistently? Umm…not exactly! But still…”I am a Jesus-girl who can step on a scale and simply see an indication of how much my body weighs, not the worth of who I am”!

I stepped on the scale…

+2.4 lbs!

Ugh

Last week’s gain was a result of water retention and muscle gain. I’m sure.

This week’s gain…Red Velvet cheesecake, hamburgers, not working out regularly…need I go on?

It makes sense…but still…it feels crummy! Everything in me wanted to go back to bed. Instead, I had a little talk with Jesus. It wasn’t the end of the world. But it’s not a great feeling either. I walked away from my time with the Lord feeling better…but I still didn’t want to exercise. I wanted to watch TV and lose myself in someone else’s reality. So I did what I typicaly do. I tweeted!

Had anothr bad weigh n this AM. Now its 1 of those days where I wanna sit & do nothing…like yesterday! Help me tweeps! I need inspiration!

And boy did I get it:

@Kalaminoaka you are God’s beautiful child! It is another opportunity to lean on Him, for He is our strength!
@hadleycst hi praying for you, remember a bad workout is better than no workout.
@Air1Dave Take it one minute at a time. Tell yourself ur gonna work out for one minute, then one more minute, etc. Break it down
@WmPowellJr if you focus on the bad .. enemy wins … Get up and #Move through it #GodLovesYou
@ginsamica you have come too far to give up now! You inspired me to lose 30+ pounds
@meantforsomeone Everything for the Glory of God. A bad weigh in for u might be an encouragement to someone else to know they aren’t alone.
@melonymckaye Today=Nat’l Positive Thinking Day 🙂 A bad attitude is like a flat tire..don’t change it & you won’t get anywhere. New day!
@SheilaWalsh the bad weigh in is now in the past. You are beautiful and strong and worth fighting for!! xx

I even had several “tweeps” inspire me with my own songs:

@beckyjomama If I could, I would send you a video of my 4yr old singing The Truth About Me at the top of her lungs. Start over now Girl!
@karlenecampbell can’t let a bad weigh in steal your drive. Keep it going! You’re “Stronger”!!!
@Gerdien_R Listen [to] your own ‘These Days’ It might remember you of His love and faithfullnes through all those little things. 😉
@jerryhyde put on Good morning, and realize u r a huge inspiration both physically and spiritually, keep up the hard work!!!
@autumndene “Now Im smiling and Im kissing all my worries goodbye Got the feeling, if I spread my wings I might even fly You are my truth, my way Give me the strength to say Get up, get up, get up”

Hehehe…I just love my “tweeps”! Feeling inspired, I sent out another tweet (“Thx 4 the inspiration tweeps! On treadmill watchin Who Wants 2b a Millionaire, ironically callin on MY ‘Lifeline’!http://twitpic.com/6kfdxs ), and got on my treadmill & elliptical trainer for an hour and a half!

During commercial breaks I read all of the Twitter responses and saw a couple who suggested that I not weigh anymore. I began thinking about that and thought I might share why I will continue to weigh. You see, I fully believe that I am more than a number on a scale. I’ve always believed that…even when I weighed over 300lbs (Ironically, it was at that weight that I released my debut album “True Beauty“)! I am convinced that my beauty does not come from my outward appearance. 100+ lbs ago I claimed 1 Peter 3:3-4 as one of my life scriptures:

Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.

I know that my value and worth are not based on my body size. My value comes from the Lord. Jesus deemed me valuable enough to die for. That fact remains no matter how much I weigh (Can I get an “Amen”)!

While losing over 100lbs has had an added benefit of feeling better about the way that I look, this journey has been about so much more than that. It has been about freedom (which is why my second album “Freedom” donned that title and many songs about such, as God began setting me free from this lifelong addiction to food)! I was not living the abundant life Jesus died for me to have because I was bound by my weight. When I began being obedient to Him, and living according to His Spirit and not my flesh, I felt closer to Him. I felt His pleasure. And yes, I felt FREE!

Two times along the journey though, I hit a plateau. I felt like I was doing everything right, but I was not losing weight. I knew this because I weighed myself regularly. Something was wrong. Both times I hit a plateau, the culprit was an extremely low metabolic rate. The first time this was caused because I was not eating enough. The second time was because my vitamin D levels were too low. Once I remedied both of these things my metabolism regulated and I began losing weight again. But I would not have known something was wrong if I hadn’t been weighing. I should also add that I gauge the fit of my clothes as well as try to measure with Trainer Tina monthly. I know that many factors can result in an increased number on the scale (time of the month, water retention, muscle weighing more than fat). But I do believe that if it consistently stays the same or increases, something isn’t working. I know that weighing is not the only indicator on how successful a weight loss journey is…but it IS in fact, an indicator. I don’t believe in being a slave to the scale. But weighing has, at several times, been an aid on my journey to be healthy. I don’t want it to dictate how I feel about myself. But I admit, it sometimes does. Having struggled with my weigh my entire life, that is something I am still working on. I want to be balanced in my thinking about my weight. What can I say? I’m a work in progress.

Still, next Tuesday I will weigh. I am determined that it will not dictate my worth or my mood. But you know what? Knowing that I will step on my scale in 7 days will help me make healthy choices this week. I guess I look at it as a sense of accountability.

I know that I am on a similar journey as many of you. I read your responses and would love to hear your thoughts on this!

I’ll leave you with a video tnvolscowgirl made for my song “The Truth About Me” on youtube. I am clinging to these words today.

Disa

2011-09-13T21:58:26+00:00 Sep 13th|Blog|36 Comments

36 Comments

  1. Ms. Chocolate September 13, 2011 at 10:18 pm - Reply

    Hello my georgeous friend. Phil.4:13 is not a miracle cure. You have to make it work. Now you know I love to eat, but I want to serve Him healthy. I pray with you every week and you have done well. Just keep it up and don’t let satan tempt you. I have the hardest time going to mom’s, but I’ve learn to say no and leave the house.
    I will be in Nashville the last of October at Lifeway. Let me know if you will be in town. I would love to see you.

    Blessings;

    Ms. C

  2. cynthia cunha-bird September 13, 2011 at 10:22 pm - Reply

    I want to say you are beautiful not only on the outside but on the inside. I wanted to get down to meet you when you were here in Billings for over the top. But since the elevators weren’t working yet couldn’t get downstairs. After listening to you on K-love and talking about Made to crave I purchase the whole set. I started it on my own but didn’t get to far. But our womens group is doing it as a bible study this fall. But with what I have learned so far and your encouragement I have lost 25 lbs. And like you I weigh myself. Because if I don’t my mind tricks me into thinking I am doing ok when I really am not. So keep up the good work. Another think that has helped me is a list of I am… from Jennifer Rothchild’s Me myself and lies. In there she lists about 20 I am statements. Also in conjuction with the Made to crave I made a braclet to which I made an acroustic out of Made to crave and it would be my pleasure to send you one. God Bless you and Thanks for the encouragement.
    Let me know an address I can send it to. It has helped me to remember why I am on this journey. God Bless Cynthia

  3. Rosanna Lindeman September 13, 2011 at 10:24 pm - Reply

    Thank you SOOOOOO much for posting this today. I’m taking it to my Lose it for Life group tonight, where I’ll share it w/the ladies. We’re currently reading Made to Crave and will be talking about Ch. 11. I love that God sends us encouragement as we reach out to Him and others for it. Thx for keeping it real. Praying for you this week lady!

    ~Rosanna in Denver

  4. Sara Schaffer September 13, 2011 at 10:28 pm - Reply

    The scale sits in my bathroom, and when I feel the quiet “it’s okay” from the Lord, I step on it. Like you said, the numbers don’t define me, but I do want to honor and take care of the body I’ve been given. Only a few short years on this planet, and I want every drop of blessing, in every area of life that God wants to give me! If that means having some “scale accountability” to stay disciplined, I’ll do it. Thanks for sharing the journey, Mandisa!

  5. PTrainerShonda September 13, 2011 at 10:31 pm - Reply

    Hey Disa!

    So so proud of you for challenging yourself physically, mentally, and spiritually and treating your temple with care! You’re story is a great testament that its not the swiftest or the strongest who wins the race, but the one who endures =D. I just did a video blog on my website about this because some of my clients were dealing with the same struggles. As you lay all your weaknesses at our Fathers feet, he will continue to give you the strength to endure because His strength is made Perfect in our weakness. Way to conqueror the “dreaded scale” mentality & decide within yourself you’re more than a number but fearfully & wonderfully made. So glad I came across your page I can’t wait to share it with my boot campers and clients! S/O to your Trainer Tracy she sounds like an awesome woman of God combining faith & fitness. Excited to follow your journey =D

    Love Ya!

  6. Alaine September 13, 2011 at 10:37 pm - Reply

    You inspire me to continue with my journey to a better lifestyle…as I exercise, your songs play and I can relate to “Stronger” and “Good Morning”. It’s a new day, whatever happened yesterday is in the past and we can’t change it, so we have a choice…to either move forward or let the guilt wear us down, then we make the bad choice, and it’s a vicious cycle.

    I relate to the scale thing…I’ve been working out with a personal trainer in a group setting and not seeing the scale move down, but UP! So I decided to look for the little changes…yes, my clothes fit better, had more engery…so my body had gotten toner and more muscle…YES! That I can live with…but I knew for me, that journaling, was my last resort to be truthful to what goes in my body. HATE to journal, this is my 5th day…and it’s amazing to how better I feel…IF I have to write it…I tend to NOT eat it!

    None of this is possible without our Lord Jesus Christ when we come to Him with our difficulties, even our food issues. He is there to guide us along, love us when we don’t and put people in our path along our way!

    So, Mandisa, you keep on going…remember where you where at one time, you’ve come a long way and this is not going to defeat you! GO GIRL! Love you!

  7. Teresa Lane September 13, 2011 at 10:42 pm - Reply

    Mandisa, I agree with you. I am not one who has to step on the scale every day but at least once a week right before I have to go weigh in at my Weight Watchers meeting. I want to know if I will show good results or not before I go so I am prepared. I get hung up on the scale some too but I am like you, in that even at my highest weight I still knew I was loved by Jesus no matter what the number said, but I knew I wouldn’t feel as good about myself because of not getting healthier, etc……and turning too often to junk food. I ask God all the time to please change my taste buds and make me crave the healthy foods! Loll! But I know he wants me to give it to him by turning to him instead of the junk. I’m so thankful that there is a loving God who knows us inside and out and knows our deepest cares and struggles and so wants to help us if only we will let him. I know I obviously have issues with giving up the controls so I pray and I pray and I weigh and I pray some more. Big hugs, Mandisa! I LOVE your song, “The Truth About Me”. I cry so many times while its coming through my speakers. And ” Stronger” is sure a great one too while going through the frustrations such as trying to eat healthy and lose weiggal Love you, gal!

  8. meshelle September 13, 2011 at 10:49 pm - Reply

    Thank you so much for this today…I read with tears in my eyes! I needed the encouragement today! You are right…the numbers on the scale don’t define me, it’ who I am in God that defines me! I am His beautiful creation and I am worthy of His love!

  9. Ted September 13, 2011 at 11:06 pm - Reply

    I’d like to think I’m running on a straight path and not a track that goes round and round….but sometimes….it really feels like round & round! The moments of success make me think I’ll never return to where I’ve been, but sure enough I find myself looking at the same signs I thought I’d never see again.

  10. Megan September 13, 2011 at 11:06 pm - Reply

    Keep up the great work and dedication with weighing yourself on a regular basis. You are an encouragement to alot of those around you, and to those you may never meet. To have the point of view of being a “Jesus girl” and to know that your weight “isn’t an indication of how much my body weighs, not the worth of who I am” is a fantastic point of view. Keep on weighing in on Tuesday and reaching out for prayers from others when you feel let down or discouraged. As a church body we are here to lift each other up when we are down and to call on our Lord and Savior to help lift the spirits of those we know are having a bad day.

    Sing out loud and to the Lord. When I have a bad day my Sister always tells me, “do everything for the Glory of God.” I can never stay in a bad mood when she says that, because that isn’t bring Glory to God.

    Your hard work the rest of this week will certainly pay off at your weigh in next Tuesday!

  11. Sharon Glick September 13, 2011 at 11:10 pm - Reply

    I wanted to share something with you.

    A little over three years ago, I attended a EWomen Conference at Tulsa, OK along with some other ladies in our church. You were a part of that weekend. During that weekend you and a couple of the ladies shared your life’s stories. Many of you shared having experienced some form of abuse in your life. Someone gave the statistic that 1 out of every 4 ladies have been abused.

    Also on that weekend one of the girls in the group had given several of us a written testimony of her life’s journey, which included abuse and it’s devastating affect on her.

    On the way home there were four of us in a cluster talking about the great weekend we had experienced and as we share we discovered that 3 out of the 4 girls in the conversation had suffered abuse in some way.

    We felt God calling us to ministry in some way. We took the next several months to pray and ask for His direction. We just keep saying yes. Out of that weekend and after much prayer, S.O.A.R. was born. Survivors Of Abuse Recovery. A women’s support group. We get together and share, talk and help each other on our journey to becoming whole. We meet here at our church on the first and third Wednesdays of the month. We are ministering to over 35 ladies. A couple of us volunteer at the NWA Rape Crisis Center as advocates for Rape/Sexual Assault Victims.

    I attended your concert that you did here in Rogers, AR with Anita Renfro (at CrossChurch on August 29) and you shared once again about your abuse and it’s affects on you.

    I just wanted to say thank you. Thank you for being honest and real.

    I am healthier now then I have ever been inside and like you, I am working on the outside. There is so much the Lord has delivered me from.

    I pray God will continue to bless you and your ministry. And, He will give you strength to accomplish your physical goals as well.

  12. Erin September 13, 2011 at 11:26 pm - Reply

    What a great post, Mandisa. It’s so great that you don’t let the numbers define you. I struggled for MANY years with anorexia, and let me tell you, the scale totally determined my worth. I had to learn that no matter what I weighed, I would always be just as valuable to God. Today, I can view my weight as simply one indicator of health. Keep up the great work! I love ya:-)

  13. Janelle Flint September 13, 2011 at 11:59 pm - Reply

    Mandisa,
    Thank you so much for your transparency. I am encouraged by what you had to say. Know that you are being prayed for by our sweet little family. When I met you in person earlier this year I was so blessed. Your smile, your spirit, your voice, your presence. It was all so inspiring. You and Anita certainly make a good team. Hang in there Mandisa. You are MORE than a conqueror. 100+ pounds is AMAZING. You go girl….

    In Him,

    Janelle Flint

  14. Melissa September 14, 2011 at 12:19 am - Reply

    Janay and I loved meeting you at WOF! Thanks for signing her stuffed animal paw! I praise God for what WE all are learning as we make better choices and change our lives to Glorify God in a mightier way! God bless you sis….Keep at it and we will all cheer you as you DO It in Jesus NAME!
    Love ya….and keep it rocking…love the new cd!

    Melissa from Victorville, Ca

  15. Angie Haube September 14, 2011 at 12:41 am - Reply

    Mandisa…you just summarized 2 and 1/2 months of my blog in one blog post! I started my own Journey to honor God in my body and my choices about 17 months ago, and in June, God led me to start a blog about my journey to a new me. God has blessed my family and friends through my transparency…and He has blessed me even more. Thank you for sharing so openly here so that those of us who read it can learn from you, be inspired by you, and even more…pray for you. I promise to do so daily…

  16. Kim September 14, 2011 at 1:13 am - Reply

    Hey girl! Weight is always a battle for those who battle it! I don’t think it ever gets easier! I had gastric bypass three years ago and lost about 109 pounds, but never got below 200 pounds, but I was happy. Now I have gained back 25 and my fight begins again. I know it is forever in this life.
    But I also know that in God’s eyes, I am a beautiful princess and that is the part I need to remember when I get down on myself. We are perfect in His eyes daughters, my sister in Christ and nothing could be better than that!

  17. Rajneesh Kaur September 14, 2011 at 1:54 am - Reply

    Dear mandisa,
    I can understand where you are coming from. I have been on this journey for over 5 years now but it’s been a rough battle. Recently I checked my weight and the same thing happened to me as did in your first weigh in listed above. But you know what? You have given me hope that we can do this together because we are one body joined together.

    This really spoke to me and helped me beyond words can explain, thank you!
    Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.
    I got reminded tonight to not look so much on the outside but deep within my heart where Jesus lives 🙂
    Praying for your journey to become successful! I am proud of you and how far you have come in 100lbs! And praying in everything else you do!
    Love,
    Rajneesh 🙂

  18. CW September 14, 2011 at 1:59 am - Reply

    Love ya girl! U r a light and an inspiration and I loved U the 1st time u stepped on that American Idol stage! U will prob never know me here on this earth, but I’m sure we will meet in heaven! Its so easy to assign value to our outward appearance, but the ONLY thing that matters is our Love for one another and our hearts that serve Jesus! That is what lives forever in heaven! Keep ViCTORY minded…slay the enemy with the WORD of God when he speaks lies to U….

  19. Dianna B September 14, 2011 at 3:23 am - Reply

    Thank you for sharing so openly. I needed to read this. I have been struggling to “release” my weight for some time and I always run to food in stead of God. I know you don’t know me, but I added my blog above. I started it last year when I began to diet/exercise. Maybe it will be an encouragement to you, like your story is to me! Praying many blessings over you. You are beautiful and HE delights in You!

  20. Kristen Taylor September 14, 2011 at 4:35 am - Reply

    I would love to share my story with you about my journey of cravings and crazy eating habits….and how I am now free from those chains! You can check out my website or email me when you are ready. I would be happy to send you Zija’s Smart Mix (92 nutrients) all from one plant, the Moringa plant. Completely changed my health along with the health of thousands of others. This plant has been used to treat and cure over 300 diseases and is used by many organizations. Would love to tell you all about it…..praying for you!

  21. angela September 14, 2011 at 5:57 am - Reply

    When I heard ur heart at women of faith in cali, I felt a connection because I know ur struggle. For me, the battle to detach my identity and value from the scale is rarely won. In part, I realized this weekend, because I’m ashamed of my struggle and failure…so I don’t talk about it. What u shared on the mic and now in ur blog…floors me! I find myself praying for Gods to give me such courage to speak out and defeat shame. Thank u for being a messenger of His inspiration!

  22. pearlfromafrica September 14, 2011 at 6:04 pm - Reply

    Hi Mandisa,
    Thank you for sharing your struggle and your story. I first listened to your latest album a couple of months ago and your songs have been what i need to sing, breathe, think about, whisper out-loud and pray. I so need to believe the Truth that God speaks about me too.

    I would love to meet you someday if you ever find yourself in Dakar, Senegal or Nairobi, Kenya 🙂

  23. Ashley Quinn September 15, 2011 at 9:09 pm - Reply

    I just saw a pic of you on a friend’s FB page and I didn’t recognize you! You look great! I am going to start reading your blog in hopes that you can motivate me to get my butt off of the couch 🙂 Thanks!

  24. Jerrilyn September 19, 2011 at 4:31 pm - Reply

    Thank you. You’re so inspiring. Your honesty, willingness and vulnerability in sharing your story is glorifying. God is with you on this journey. I can’t wait to meet you someday… hopefully this side of heaven.

  25. Marilyn September 20, 2011 at 8:10 pm - Reply

    Mandisa, thank you for being real and open. Sometimes struggles with weight, or food are considered vain to some. The reality that it is a struggle and we are not alone is very inspiring.

  26. Juelsz September 20, 2011 at 9:28 pm - Reply

    Hey Lady! Just want to start off by saying Thank You and Bless You Sister! I’m now realizing that I have spent most of my day reading through your old blogs on the other site and just enjoying the inspiration (truth be told, i’ve done very little work today because of it).

    Ya see, I’ve always liked your music (KSBJ – Houston plays it all the time!), but it wasn’t until I picked up my recent Zlife magazine, (Zumba Magazine) where I read your interview, that I truly wanted to know more about you and the weight loss journey, so I looked at your blog. I’ve got to tell you that you are a very beautiful spirit that I enjoyed getting to know through your writings, of course, and a spirit that I would love to be connected to.

    You are truly one of a kind! I hate to take up space on your blog because I could go on forever, but I want you to know that your openness to be real with people you don’t even know is really inspiring and eye opening.

    It made me realize that I carry around shame (as much as I say I don’t and try hard to keep it from people) I realize that I’ve been wearing a mask when truly i’m hurting in the inside. Denial is a disorder, the only way to overcome it is to set yourself free by telling the truth as it is, just as you do.

    The sad part about it is that even though I know better, I still don’t do what I’m supposed to do. Why is it so hard to come to terms with the fact that only one person that walked the face of this earth was perfect and there is no other. We all fall short.

    I struggle with weight loss and have most of my life as well. I’ve always found it difficult to relate my story to others because I’m not the one that is just 10-15 pounds shy of my goal weight but I’m not in need of a 200+ pound makeover and find that most weight loss programs try to put you in one of the two boxes. Guess I’ve always been kind of in the middle.

    At my heaviest, I’ve weighed 220 pounds, at my lightest I’ve weighed 165 pounds. I’m now on a fitness journey myself. In the past four months I’ve gained enough to put me a little over the 200 lb mark AGAIN! The sad part is, I know better. I have all the knowledge about fitness (just got my bachelor’s in Fitness and Human Performance in May), and still find it hard to apply to my life.

    Because I don’t “look the part” I don’t like to tell anyone that I have a BS in Fitness, and nevermind the fact that I’m certified in Zumba, Tai Chi, and TurboKick. I’ve got to get it back, not sure where it got lost. It wasn’t until I read about your bingeing episodes that I was able to identify with the addiction I have. I was in denial but I want to break the chains that bound and keep me from being free and I think this is it.

    I started my journey at the beginning of this month and talk about hard, oh my, I can relate when you say this is the hardest thing i’ve ever had to do. But I’m glad I found your blog because I’m most certainly inspired to do what it takes to break these chains now!

    Thank you for the beautiful spirit that you are and the loving spirit you share with the world, I deeply and truly am inspired. Be blessed sister, as you say, you are not in this alone!
    xoxo++

  27. Kelly Bass September 21, 2011 at 6:38 pm - Reply

    Just wanted to say that I love your blog! So inspiring and I love your ability to be transparent. I, too, have a struggle with the scale. I’ve been on my “journey to a more disciplined life” for only 6 months. I’m glad that I have people like you to help motivate me and keep going. If you are interested, my blog is git2git.blogspot.com. GIT 2 GIT stands for “Girl it’s Time to Get it Together”! Also, I love your “Good Morning” song! I’ve been jamming to it all week! Thanks for being you!

  28. Rigomp October 1, 2011 at 4:13 pm - Reply

    Hi, I Just want God Bless you Mandisa, the first Time I listen Stronger ministried my life and now i’m your follower. every people i see in facebook recomend this song.

    In Puravidafm.net, santo domingo stronger always sound evere day i heard it

    From Dominican Republic

    Bless you..

  29. Gail October 4, 2011 at 9:06 pm - Reply

    I am so inspired by you. You are such a real genuine person. I hope that on my journey I can stay as focused as you have on the things I need to focus on.

    I wish you could provide an example food list of what you normally take in a day. I know fruits and vegetables and lean meats, but seeing it laid out helps me.

    thank you,

  30. Darcy October 15, 2011 at 10:41 pm - Reply

    Great post! I absolutely love MADE TO CRAVE. God has used that book to change my life. I agree about not throwing out the scale too!

    Just saw you at WOF in Sac. So enjoyed you.

    xo

  31. Sarah October 20, 2011 at 6:02 am - Reply

    I called into KTIS yesterday to ask for ” stronger”. I am fighting to beat an eating disorder and I’m in outpatient awaiting inpatient treatment. The radio host suggested I read your blogs and boy am I glad she said that. I feel encouraged to keep fighting and to keep clinging to Jesus for my life , for my lil boy to have a momma and for my marriage… I can’t let food, or lack thereof; beat me. I am stronger than that and you encourage me!! Thank you !

  32. Kathy October 21, 2011 at 7:24 pm - Reply

    Hey Disa! Please, please don’t lose hope! Can I share something with you? I have spent my whole life battling this weight thing. About a year ago my doctor suggested that I give up wheat. I thought “Wheat???” What about wheat bread and all that fiber and goodness??? Give it up along with any other grain that is wheat like. Barley, rye . . . seriously??? Well I did this and while I was at it I gave up refined sugar too since most things with wheat also contained refined sugar. Guess what . . I have lost 55 pounds so far. I am told that a wheat allergy can affect your metabolism so even though I was eating healthily and exercising, my metabolism just couldn’t get with the program. I really prayed about this change before I did it, knowing that all good things come from God above. Sure wish I would have know this before I hit my 50’s. It would have saved me a lot of pain and frustration. Not sure if this is helpful info or not, but it may be worth a try. There are tons of great foods out there that are wheat and refined sugar free. There are also some awesome websites that I have used for recipes and motivation. I still need to watch portions and keep active. Over all, I am so much better for the change I made and proved to myself the I have the discipline to make such a major change in my eating. I am happy to share more if you would like. Contact me at the email address I have listed if so.

    BTW, you were at WOF in Phoenix and you were awesome!!!! I was so blessed by the whole event, and certainly enjoyed getting to see you perform. You are an AMAZING woman! I am praying for you Disa! Many blessings!!!

    Kathy

  33. jessica November 9, 2011 at 3:51 am - Reply

    mandis you are so good my mom and i love you could you come to mo you are my best christan singer ever with toby mac its so good and while im wait on tommrow you are so good if you could come t mo and to a concert that would be the best day of my life !!!!

  34. Kathy December 21, 2011 at 1:45 am - Reply

    Thanks so much for posting this. I missed it the first time. I love the video. Love the photos, especially of the birds. God brightens my day when he sends birds my way, it lifts my spirit. The video – wow, it is so true. I feel so worthless, like a wasted person. I have the desire to serve God, for God to use me – but I am weighed down by my physical appearance. I need to lose at least 100 lbs. I am so embarrassed to be around people. How can I possibly be what God wants me to be when I am a prisoner to my weight. I don’t have the freedom to walk across the room without being aware of how hideous I feel. I was lucky to attend the concert at Freemont this weekend. When you sang “take the shackles off my feet so I can dance”, I surely identified with this song! I have had so many bad things happen in life. Years and years of sadness and pain, rejection, sickness. Since my first month of marriage, my husband just has not needed a relationship, a wife doesn’t mean anything special to him, we are like college room mates, just going places together. (When I heard the song “He is With You” and you sang “your husband doesn’t kiss you anymore”, I just cried and cried). Almost 24 years of rejection and not being loved. I am imprisoned by depression. I can’t function, can’t think to clean my house, to do anything. And when you don’t feel loved by your husband, and you know he would not want you if you weighed 98 lbs., it keeps you from having the mental strength to discipline yourself to diet and exercise. On top of that, I spent summer , along with my sister, taking care of my mother. We found out in the summer she had Lou Gehrig’s Disease and she was gone 5 days after my birthday in the fall. Hospice came, and my sister and I gave her Morphine and the other medicine to help her. It has been one nightmare after another. Then, my husband was diagnosed with a retinal disease. His vision — like looking through the cardboard from a roll of paper towels, gets smaller and smaller. He fell once, at my aunt’s funeral dinner, and as a result needed to have surgery for face reconstruction. He now can barely see the food on his plate. He went out last week to take the garbage out and couldn’t find his way back to the house, my cell phone rang and it was him calling, asking me to come out and find him. So, when am I ever going to have any joy? I stay determined to hold onto God, but it is hard. Everyday is filled with sadness and pain. I am going to have to get the book Made to Crave. Maybe it will help. I enjoyed your concert so much! I was so happy to meet you after the show, along with my husband. God Bless You! Thanks for posting comments about your struggle with weight, it encourages me. I also can diet and watch every bite I put in my mouth, and exercise and gain. I have been told that I do not eat enough and that my metabolism doesn’t work then. When I am dieting, I eat more food that I eat when I am not on a diet. I also have thyroid problems, and that makes it all worse. God bless you, Mandisa.

  35. gladibelong2Jesus January 20, 2012 at 11:21 pm - Reply

    i was thinking about my list of role models, and Mandisa, ur on it! U r such an inspiration to me. U hav really let the Holy Spirit work in ur life. And ur real about ups and downs in ur spiritual and physical life. Ur HUMAN, plain and simple, but a human that Christ has redeemed, and a human that is letting God work through u. Ur songs r a gr8 encouragement to me too.
    I struggle w/ thinking overly much about my weight and my looks. I’m 5’4, and 140 pounds (and a young teen), and am getting somewhat obsessed about losing weight. whenever im w/ other teens i feel inadequate or something like that, because most of the girls are so pretty and thin, and im standing there with a rather wide face and somewhat wide body. it really discourages me. but then i listen to ur songs about true beauty on the inside, and im encouraged, and challenged to start working on making my insides more beautiful. Thank u for following the Lord, ur a real encouragement to me. And thank you about being so real about any mistakes u make. sometimes i feel so bad becuz i make a lot of mistakes in my Christian walk, and then i see other Christians, such as my pastor, just serving the Lord and talking so happily about him, and i get discouraged. it seems like they never make mistakes (i know they do, they say as much, but still it seems like they’re super Christians or something). But ur being real about mistakes has encouraged me. if i can be half as mature as u, i would be glad.
    Well, ive prattled on long enough. Thanks again, Mandisa.

  36. Terri King December 6, 2012 at 3:06 am - Reply

    Wow wow wow!!! You, my blessed sister in Christ are real, wise and beautiful from the inside out!

    I had a scale that wasn’t working and I was in bondage to so I finally threw it out and started my first spiritual weight loss program where God is the director and cheerleader. I weigh weekly at the gym and agree that it’s important for accountability and awareness. This is especially true for those of us who lack the natural ability to consistently eat moderate portions of healthy foods. I need the supports of various sources to stay on track and also love “Made to Crave,” from which I found one of my mantras, “Everything is permissible, but not everything is beneficial.”

    God Bless you and keep inspiring us!

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