Single Appreciation Week-Day 2

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I loved reading the comments so many of you posted on yesterday’s blog! If you missed it, you can still read it here. And congratulations to the winner of The Single Woman‘s upcoming book, Iโ€™ve Never Been to Vegas, But My Luggage Has: Mishaps and Miracles on the Road to Happily Ever After. It releases March 11 so the rest of you can pre-order TSW’s book by clicking the title above.

Today I thought we could talk about honoring our future spouse and our Heavenly Father during this season of singleness. There are a few ways I try to do this:

  • I live with honor by praying for my future husband. I may not know who he is, but God does. I can lift him up to our Creator and rest in the fact that God hears me and answers my pleas for him. When I pray for my future husband, I believe I am participating with God as He writes our love story. Furthermore, talk about a prayer of faith! Hebrews 11:6 says that faith pleases the Lord. Since I literally have no idea who I’m praying for, I know God is pleased with me! Ha! ๐Ÿ˜€

“But surely God has heard me; He has paid attention to the urgency of my request. May the True God be blessed, for He did not turn away from my prayer nor did He hold back His loyal love from me.” Psalm 66:19-20 (The Voice)

  • I live with honor by seeking to become the woman God created me to be. I use 1 Corinthians 13:4-7, Colossians 3:1-17, and Galatians 5:13-23 as my guide for things to cultivate in or eliminate from my life.
  • I live with honor by walking in purity. Our culture would have us believe that living a pure and celibate life before marriage is impossible, unacceptable, and even a little kooky. But it’s not! It is God’s plan for each of His children. Not because He is holding something good from us, but because He knows the dangers living outside of His will.

“Hold marriage in high esteem, all of you, and keep the marriage bed pure because God will judge those who commit sexual sins.” Hebrews 13:4 (The Voice)

Furthermore, God knows His original design for the sacred union of marriage and sex as a holy act between a husband and wife. His teaching to flee from sexual sin is out of protection for us:

“In marriage neither the husband nor the wife should act as if his or her body is private propertyโ€”your bodies now belong to one another, and together they are whole.” 1 Corinthians 7:4 (The Voice)

A few weeks ago, The Bachelor (season 17), Sean Lowe (who has been public about his faith in Jesus), and his then fiance (now wife), Catherine Giudici were very open about their celibacy. Late night host, Jimmy Kimmel just couldn’t believe that they had been engaged for 14 months and had not had sex!

And for the record, they passed their polygraph test. See?

I don’t want to make it seem like resisting temptation is easy. It’s not; but by the power of the Holy Spirit, it is possible…and so worth it! Even if you have already had sex, God specializes in redemption and creating beauty from ashes. There is no condemnation in Christ Jesus. If you hear lies of shame picking up a stone and saying that it is too late, tell the devil to step off and tune your ears to hear Jesus whispering sweet messages of love, forgiveness, and grace to you right now.

“Jesus stood up and said to her, ‘Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?’ She said, ‘No one, Lord.’ And Jesus said, ‘Neither do I condemn you; go, and from now on sin no more.'” John 8:10-11 (ESV)

To honor my future husband and my God, and as a follower of Christ, I am seeking to live a life worthy of that knowledge. So is my friend, Jaime Jamgochian. In a world where women are bombarded with images that try to brainwash us into believing that we are only as important as our bodies, Jaime’s ministry, “Modest is Hottest” is designed to help young people take a stand against culture and live a Christ-filled life.

Find out more about Jaime, how to bring this event (or a new event that she and the friend I introduced to you on yesterday’s blog, Mandy Hale) to your area, click here. And be sure to follow Jaime on Twitter and Facebook!

For today’s giveaway I’m hooking someone up with one of Jaime’s latest worship CDs, “Above the Noise” and one of her “Modest Is Hottest” shirts that I rock often!

MIH2Just leave a comment sharing your thoughts on honoring God and/or your future spouse and I’ll choose someone as the winner! Ready? Go!

2014-02-10T22:33:11+00:00 Feb 10th|Blog|144 Comments

144 Comments

  1. LaDawn February 10, 2014 at 11:35 pm - Reply

    I am a single mother of two children. I have never been married. When I was about 17, my pastor’s daughter & I pledged ourselves to remain pure until we got married. We both were given a ring to wear until we got married. Neither of us kept our vow that we pledged that day. We both fell away from The Lord & backslid. We both went our separate ways as we got older & almost two years ago we came back in contact. We had both given our lives back to God. She was engaged to be married & I was blessed to get to see her walk down the aisle to marry the man God had for her. I had pledged myself to purity for awhile but about a year ago I came across the ring I wore as a teenager & I started wearing it again as a reminder that even though I had sinned before it didn’t mean that I couldn’t pick back up because I know God has forgiven me for my sins & mistakes. So, now I wear it to remind myself that even though I may have failed in the past, it doesn’t mean I have to fail now. My friends, coworkers, & even some family think that I’m crazy for wanting to save myself for marriage since it is obvious that I am not a virgin. But I believe waiting is part of God’s plan & I believe he will bless my future marriage if I save myself. I know He will do the same for you too! God bless!

  2. Becca February 11, 2014 at 7:47 am - Reply

    I love this post, ‘Disa! I want honor God AND give my future husband the best wedding gift possible! I’ve worn a ‘I’ll wait’ ring since I was 14 (now 22) and when I was 18 wrote my future husband a letter about why I’m waiting, and why I’m choosing to save myself for him.
    I can’t wait to give him that letter one day, until now I pray that God is preparing his heart, and mine, so that one day we will be ready for each other!

  3. Melinda Kitzmiller February 11, 2014 at 8:13 am - Reply

    My husband Bob passed away in April of 2011. Who ever considers re-entry in the single world? I never did. And in the years since his passing, I’ve asked God to protect my heart, to keep me pure, to mold me into the women he wants me to be even though I’m in my 50’s! I know God’s not through with me yet! God keeps me filled; not wanting, not needing (well most of the time!) but content in Him. But I often wonder if God has someone set aside for me. There is someone whom He has placed in my path but I’m just waiting on God, asking Him to protect my heart (don’t want to be hurt) and to keep me pure for my future spouse if that’s His plan for me. As the Lord works on my inside (spiritual), I’m asking Him to strengthen me with His power as I work on my “outside” (physical)! There is beauty in these ashes! Celebrating day 2 of Single Appreciation week with all of you!

  4. Jennie R February 11, 2014 at 8:21 am - Reply

    I have not kept myself sexual pure and I regret that decision to this day. However, I have been trying to walk in sexual purity. Everyday I success with the Lord’s help is one more day of victory.

  5. Mariah Honig February 11, 2014 at 8:21 am - Reply

    I think that purity is really important. And you’re right its not easy but it will be so worth it one day. I wear a purity ring as a reminder that I’m saving myself for my future husband.

  6. Tiffany warman February 11, 2014 at 8:22 am - Reply

    For my sister Becka, someday will meet the man God has for her.

  7. Nora Weil February 11, 2014 at 8:24 am - Reply

    I’m married and have no daughters. But we do have four young sons. I love that you ladies are proclaiming this message so strongly!! I love it for my boys growing up to meet these beautiful modest women, and I love it for my single girl friends! Keep doing what you’re doing!!

  8. Crystal Still February 11, 2014 at 8:25 am - Reply

    I believe that me honoring my husband and God includes abstinence. I am 19 years old and I pray for my future husband daily. Whenever I am having “one of those days” where I wish I was married like mom and my grandmother at age 18, I remember God has a plan for me and he made me unique. Also I figure if God is making me wait for my husband it means First of all He is not done working in my life while I am a single lady. But also I believe that if God doesn’t give me something or doesn’t give it to me right away. Making me have patience He must have a pretty special guy out there for me:)

  9. Tammy February 11, 2014 at 8:25 am - Reply

    Mandisa, I thank God for your ministry, both musical and spiritual!! Each day as I read your blog or your posts on Facebook I realize just how much we have in common, both as Christians and as single women. It is so easy to believe that I am alone in my thoughts and feelings about being 35 and still not married, although I truly want to be. But I see now I’m not ready yet and also realizing, once again, that God’s timing is always perfect. I have gone through a rough patch recently but have truly learned the meaning of “let go, let God”. Thank you for continuing to encourage all of us daily!!

  10. Sheryl February 11, 2014 at 8:26 am - Reply

    Thank you Mandisa for how you continue to encourage us to look to God and for reminding us that He has a plan for us that is perfect, His timing is perfect even though we sometimes struggle with that timing. May God lead, guide and direct and show us His love and give us that special touch we need to know that He I there and that He cares for and loves us more than we could ever imagine!

  11. Michele February 11, 2014 at 8:27 am - Reply

    Thank you so much for your honesty and inspiration. It really helps put things in perspective! Your awesome!

  12. Jess February 11, 2014 at 8:29 am - Reply

    So many people in today’s society don’t think of sex, or “making love” as I prefer to call it, as such a big deal! God says that we’re supposed to stay pure until marriage, and that’s exactly what I intend to do. I wear a purity ring, that I’ve had for about 5 years, on my left ring finger, where my future wedding ring will be, and I never take it off. And as Mandisa’s song “Praying For You” says, “I’ll honor you with purity”. I hope that my future husband is also waiting for me! I get very frustrated and impatient, waiting for him to finally come my way, but I’ve recently realized that God has His reasons, we’re not ready for each other yet. I’ve prayed for years “God, prepare the right man for me”, but He’s been working on me, and I realized that maybe I’m the one who isn’t ready. So I started praying “Jesus, prepare ME for the right man”. That’s where I stand now, and I’m just going to continue to focus on God and I know in His right time, Mr. Right will make his debut! ๐Ÿ™‚

  13. Jaden February 11, 2014 at 8:32 am - Reply

    Purity is very important! God has a special future planned out for us so i know i need to stay pure until im in a godly marriage! I wear my purity ring everyday as a reminder to stay pure! It is not going to be easy and i know that but in the end it will definietly be worth it! I also run a purity page to encourage others to take the vow and realize the importance in staying pure! I am proud to say i am staying pure until im married!

  14. Jamie February 11, 2014 at 8:33 am - Reply

    We live in a world where sexual purity is not only rare but openly mocked. I’m living a second virginity so to speak and it is a struggle! But having pure girlfriends who are struggling with me and praying for me (& I for them) is helping to make the burden of that struggle just a little lighter. I’ve accepted that Gods plans for me most likely do not include having a husband or family of my own. I’ve made peace with that and now am focusing on trying to fully devote my life to Him and to the ministry He has brought me too. It’s a daily struggle but He & I are working on it and there is no stronger ally than the Creator of the universe! ๐Ÿ™‚

  15. Carmen P February 11, 2014 at 8:34 am - Reply

    I have made the rare decision to wait until I am married. This decision has many times have left me on a lonely road. However, I know that I am not alone and I am glad that I will be able to say to my husband on that day that I waited for him! It is an extreme blessing to know that I am not alone in this stance. Thank you for having the courage to be real and to share the things that you struggle with. I can so relate to you and your life. May you be blessed beyond measure. I also think it is awesome that you bring up the issue of waiting for your husband as a matter of faith. Too often I do not think of this as that. I feel that I can look at Valentines day in a whole new light. Oh and the playlist that you had up yesterday is amazing!!!

  16. Christina Sweet February 11, 2014 at 8:35 am - Reply

    Although my past is full of sin God has forgiven me and made me new! As an almost 42 yr old mother of 5 I am now saving myself for Gods chosen one for me! 5 yes and going strong!

  17. Kathleen February 11, 2014 at 8:36 am - Reply

    Mandisa, I love your GODly stand and obvious love for the LORD.
    GOD has blessed me tremendously through your music during divorce and unemployment.
    Enjoy Rufus while you can ๐Ÿ˜‰

  18. Dannah February 11, 2014 at 8:39 am - Reply

    Thank you for encouraging ladies to remain pure and to pray for their future husbands. I have prayed for mine from time to time but honestly as a 49 never married woman, I sometimes feel like it’s too late for me. It’s all I ever wanted…a husband and family. Now even if God gives me my desire for a husband, I know I will have no children. I have to trust Him and it is a daily battle to not let the enemies lies stay in my mind. God is good and I know He has a plan. I often pray for Him to take this desire away from me if it isn’t going to ever happen. He hasn’t chosen to do that. I know that still doesn’t mean He’s going to give me a mate. Maybe He just wants me to allow Him to fulfill that emotional roll in my life. Lean on Him.

    So I pray that you young girls will remain strong and cling to Jesus to help you through.

    • Sara Landerdahl February 12, 2014 at 9:44 pm - Reply

      Dannah, thanks for sharing your story. I’m almost 45 and have had a similar experience. Once I hit my 40’s, my pain wasn’t only that I wasn’t finding my husband, but I also knew that my chance at knowing what it means to carry a baby in my womb was probably not going to happen either. It is a grief that has been difficult to bear at times, but in those moments of struggle, I remind myself to go back to what I know to be true about God. . .that he is good to those who love him. My life certainly doesn’t look like I thought it would. It grieves me that it doesn’t. Now my prayers are more about being open and willing to accept what God brings into my life even if it doesn’t look like I imagined it would.

  19. Linda C February 11, 2014 at 8:40 am - Reply

    I’m 28 and made a promise to myself, my parents and to God when I was young to remain sexually pure . In a world where we are bombarded with images and messages of sexual promiscuity, that is definitely not an easy thing. But I trust my God to keep me strong and follow through on my promise, knowing that God is not a liar, and that my choice will be well worth it.

  20. kathy February 11, 2014 at 8:40 am - Reply

    Wow! I love your thoughts and you are beyond right when it comes to staying sexually pure isnt easy its not. I had always been proud of the fact that i was in my thirties and still pure. Then i was raped and though it wasnt my fault ive really struggled with the fact that im not anymore even though i dont have sex. It breaks my heart somedays to think im not good enough anymore but ive since learned that no matter what im still pure in Gods eyes which is most important

  21. Amanda February 11, 2014 at 8:40 am - Reply

    Thank you for the kind words to keep us inspired. Like you I pray every day for my future husband. I know that God knows who he is and that when the time is right, he will be brought into my life.

  22. Stephanie Bruskin February 11, 2014 at 8:42 am - Reply

    I feel that purity is one if the best gifts you can give your future husband. I am a youth director at my church and love that I can share with my kids that at 25 years old I have never been on a date and it doesn’t bother me. This allows me to teach them to wait on Gods plan.

  23. Lori February 11, 2014 at 8:42 am - Reply

    Thanks for the encouragement! I also pray for my future husband and it is not easy to wait, but I know his timing is the best. So, I try to dress modestly and live a pure life for God and lean into God for my strength

  24. Jeni February 11, 2014 at 8:44 am - Reply

    While I cannot change my past and the poor decisions I’ve made re: purity, I can (and have) returned to purity with the help of my ever loving, ever forgiving Father. It’s been a journey to forgive myself, to move from thinking I was “damaged goods” to believing I’m a priceless treasure, and to allow God to completely restore in me the plans He laid out for my life, but it’s been a beautiful mess along the way!

    Now, I treasure my heart, and my renewed purity, and earnestly seek after His heart. I pray for my future husband, and dream about all God has planned for me. His tender mercy is evidence that His way is best, and even though I’ve stumbled, He will still make me a new creation! 2 Corinthians 5:17

    • Kizzy February 11, 2014 at 12:47 pm - Reply

      Thank you for sharing this Jeni. I needed to read this. Every blessing, Kizzy x

  25. Ambur February 11, 2014 at 8:45 am - Reply

    I’m proud to say I’m a woman in her 30s and still a virgin. I have my purity ring in a special jewelry box, I still have my ‘True Love Waits’ card that I signed when I was 12 years old. Sometimes I feel like I’m the only one left who believes in purity, so having others publicly profess their purity strengthens me.

    • Maggi March 17, 2014 at 10:50 am - Reply

      I was a virgin until I married at 38. You get nothing more by giving it away. Men respect you. You have something on all the other women. Now make your prayer list for your man in a journal. Find a friend to pray with. Leave the right page blank for the answers. Be the woman that man wants, with your motives pure as unto the Lord. You’ll see, things will change. Be faithful.

  26. Ashley February 11, 2014 at 8:51 am - Reply

    I love the way that you are showing young girls that it is alright to wait to have sex and to wait on their future husband. God has such a great plan for us and sometimes by choosing not to wait on what we know he is going bring into out lives, we tend to fall off track. We have to know, trust, and also have faith that God is going to bless us with the person that is perfect for us, not the person that we think is perfect for us. God knows every step that we are going to take before we even take it, so why aren’t we trusting him to handle this aspect of our lives?

  27. Joanna February 11, 2014 at 8:57 am - Reply

    As a young lady these words of encouragement are much needed. At times it is hard to stay on the path that God wants, but to know that there are others out there helps. Thanks a lot!

  28. Gracie white February 11, 2014 at 9:00 am - Reply

    I’m 15. I have made a commitment to God and my future husband to stay pure until marriage. I think it’s VERY important God intended for us to wait patiently and pray for our future husband daily and honor him with purity. I wear a ring every day that I was given after I went through a “True Love Waits” class wen I was 13 years old, and want the whole world to know that I am waiting for God to send me the perfect Godly man, and in going to stay pure. I want others to know they can do it too. I’m so thankful there are still women out there who I can look up to who are still single and are staying pure. You will never know how much it means.

  29. maggie soria February 11, 2014 at 9:00 am - Reply

    After 5 kids and two failed marriages I had gotten engaged to then realize I was falling away from God and what HE wanted for me so now single again with three of my kids still at home awaiting God’s will.

  30. Brandy February 11, 2014 at 9:01 am - Reply

    I want to Honor God and my future husband by actually giving my whole heart to God, not keep part of it for my selfish desires and my wants in a husband. I have to give EVERYTHING to God, give up my control issues, what i think the perfect relationship is, and let God do His thing, because honestly that’s all that matters. I need to learn His Word and really learn to give God my whole heart all of the time.

  31. Jonie February 11, 2014 at 9:01 am - Reply

    I feel the same way! That waiting to have sex after marriage is the right thing to do! I don’t understand why having sex before marriage is a good thing to do. God has a special plan for everyone. We are supposed to keep our bodies pure becuase our is the temple of the Holy Spirit!

  32. Zoe Davis February 11, 2014 at 9:02 am - Reply

    As a 17 year old in high school, I’m constantly surrounded by people who feel the need to get into relationships. I learned at a young age that moving into things too quickly can cause much hurt. I have chosen to wait for the man that God has for me because his timing is perfect. Instead of saying, why are all my friends getting into relationships, why cant I, I say that God’s ways and thoughts are higher than my own. I’m choosing to trust him and his infinite wisdom. Also, modesty is something that many of my peers don’t understand, but I understand it as respecting my body as Gods temple. There are ways to look trendy and cute, but still modest. You are such san good role model for me and its good to see Christian women living out their faith in the way that they dress and carry themselves.

  33. Usher Ottikan February 11, 2014 at 9:02 am - Reply

    thanks to you Mandisa, i am always offering up prayers for my future husband. and those times when i post about it on my facebook wall, other people are encouraged to do so too. i guess it’s something that we often overlook. but i am glad to have you in my life *wink*. well…maybe not literally, coz of your faith in Christ, i became your number one fan, however far away i may be. Again, thank for this blog post too. keep those thoughts coming. and please be encouraged that you are an encouragement to a soul (me). love u girl….!

  34. Jules February 11, 2014 at 9:05 am - Reply

    I have always dreamed if being a mom and God had not answered that prayer. Yet I still believe. I’ve kept myself pure and am waiting in Him. But I like the idea of praying for my future husband. And what a blessing it would be to know one day he was praying for me too.

  35. Lillian Herrera February 11, 2014 at 9:06 am - Reply

    I’m happy to be single right now and waiting on the Lord, because I’ve seen to many couples get hurt by not waiting, theres abuse no respect for one and another. I learned from seeing my mom and friends around me get hurt; Then I was listening to Rebecca St.James, she had one song that stood to me, the song is wait for me. Rebecca waited for God to give her husband ,and God answer her prayers,she married and she having baby on the way. I’m so happy for her gave me joy seeing how God works in his timing. I’m 23 and I know God always gives you the best.

  36. Brittany February 11, 2014 at 9:07 am - Reply

    I believe purity is more than not having sex. I am 20 and am a virgin, never had a first kisss, and never been on a date. I think it would be so awesome if the only man I dated was the man I married. It is a struggle when I have friends who are married or pregnant. I look to God for help and know in the end it will be worth it.

  37. Tosha Wallen February 11, 2014 at 9:09 am - Reply

    I can say that I honor God to the fullest when it comes to not having sex before I’m married. I had some things happen to me in the past, that makes me have major trust issues with sex period. But I feel like God has a plan for me, and I honor him and my future husband. Even though I’m not getting married anytime soon, Go has someone out there for me and someday I will get married someday and I think it is awesome that I can share that special moment with my future husband someday!

  38. Amanda Skold February 11, 2014 at 9:11 am - Reply

    Mandisa,
    I so appreciate your willingness to share! It really helps other single women feel as though they are not alone. It is so inspiring. Thank you!

  39. Kelly Jones February 11, 2014 at 9:13 am - Reply

    By the amazing grace of God I have kept myself sexually pure for longer than I ever dreamed I would have to. I’m nearly 37 and am definitely among very few who are still waiting for marriage to have sex. Although it’s tough, I know God is pleased and I am blessed to remain sexually pure.

  40. Deb February 11, 2014 at 9:14 am - Reply

    Thanks so much Mandisa for your encouragment and for giving us single gals the chance to realize we are not alone in our struggles or in our “celibate/virgin” status even when we are getting up there in years. I pray for more godly marriages to be formed in our country, and pray scripture over myself and my F.H. (If he exists) every week. I sometimes wonder what if I’m praying for someone that doesn’t exist, but I’m going by faith that no prayer is ever wasted, even if it’s for an imaginary person!

  41. B February 11, 2014 at 9:14 am - Reply

    As a single Christian woman of 31, and still a virgin, saving myself for marriage, I know purity is important to our Father. He speaks of it in his word. So therefore, I am waiting.

    I love that you pray FOR your future husband, Mandisa. I find myself praying about my future husband, more than praying for him.

    I find your posts inspirational, they speak to my heart. Thank you so much for being not only a inspiration to this single girl, but to many others as well.

  42. cynde Hauser February 11, 2014 at 9:20 am - Reply

    I became single again over 10 years ago and was raising my daughters. I wanted to do things God’s way this time so God would bless any new relationship by starting it the way God would want in a sexually pure way. It was also important to me to be the best example I could be to my girls. If I want them to know I believe what God says I have to do what God says. So I have. I haven’t found that new relationship in my life with a man but my relationship with God has grown closer day by day and in the process of my daily walk I have been an example as I tell my girls what God expects out of them. And showed them it is possible to do this and be blessed and have joy till another man shares the journey with me one day.

  43. Crystal February 11, 2014 at 9:29 am - Reply

    Four years ago I turned away from doing things “my way” and started being obedient to Christ. Best decision ever!

  44. Dona Corbin February 11, 2014 at 9:34 am - Reply

    I am a 55 yr old woman who has lived her life
    much like the Samaritan Woman in the New
    Testament; I have been legally married, divorced &
    have had 2 common law husbands. The last one
    ended up leaving me stranded with a brand new house
    payment as well as a new car payment. I now Believe
    that this happened because God wanted me to be in a
    sexual relationship within the confines of marriage. I also
    think that my first legal marriage did not work out because
    God was not included in our marriage.
    Today as I wait for God to bring a Godly man in my life,
    I have made a promise to myself to save myself for this man.
    It has been 12 years now, and even though men have moved on
    because of it, I still remain pure in wait for “the one ”
    Thanks Mandissa, for encouraging those of us who wait upon the
    Lord!

  45. Sammy February 11, 2014 at 9:37 am - Reply

    Im proud to say im still a virgin. It amazes me that people think that relationships are only based on sex. What Shaun in his interview said is something that I always say and really believe. That you need to have that friendship and relationship more than the physical attraction. Maybe that is why people gets divorced so easily

  46. Deborah mills February 11, 2014 at 9:39 am - Reply

    I’m 49 years old and beginning all over again. iv been divorced. now three years. and during this time I’ve learned that dating is a lot different now then when i was a young woman how ever i have not. i miss the companionship getting up with someone there i misss the love and physical behavior between a man and woman . I miss having a best friend to do everything with. when i began dating i could not believe what. Christian men expected from me. i no longer date. I’m praying to God. about my needs i cry out to God about my needs I’m trusting Gods plan bending to God’s will for me for my happy joyful loving future with my new best friend my new love my new husband my new lover. its not happened yet but God has said it will and i CHOOSE to believe. love Deborah

  47. Melissa February 11, 2014 at 9:41 am - Reply

    Mandisa, you are a blessing. I am learning more and more everyday, how important my relationship with God is. It’s THE most important relationship. I have faith that His love for me is unending, and it makes being single a blessing, for all good things come to those who trust in His timing. ๐Ÿ™‚ What a happy faithful realization and acceptance. Have a blessed day!!

  48. Chanelle February 11, 2014 at 9:42 am - Reply

    I get sooo pumped when I see things like this!! God has given me the same burning passion to show young women that thier singleness can be celebrated! And that He wants to even use us in out singleness to help other women! My name is Chanelle, I am 23yrs old and God has delivered me from a past of addiction, sex and overall just being angry, hurt, lost and alone. Growing up was hard for me and I hated myself and my world. I didn’t know Jesus. I was in a deep addiction for 7 years and had no idea who I was.. Always trying to be who everyone else wanted me to be. But God knew who I was and He knew who I could be in Him! In 2011 I entered a faith based rehab program that’s all about Jesus! It’s a year program that allows you to heal and be set free from the things of your past and just sit at the feet of Jesus and soak in his presence! I didn’t know God when I came into the program and was very angry.. But He started to soften my heart with His love and have me new eyes. All of this to say, I graduated the program in 2012 and I now work at this women’s centre(Teen Challenge G.T.A) as a cook and see women being set free by His love and grace daily! A lot of the girls actually love your music Mandisa and your song overcomer could e our theme song! ๐Ÿ™‚ through these last 3 years God has brought on a journey of getting to know my true identity in Christ and with that He had called me to a season of singleness! He is showing me that only He can truely satisfy and that I am complete in Him no matter what! I love #14 on the celebrate your singleness list that Before wearing a diamond God is taking me on a journey of becoming one!! I pray for my husband and mostly I pray that God would make me the wife that God wants me to be! I have also written a list about the things I want for my husband and I pray into those things! ๐Ÿ™‚ I know that the wait will be sooo worth while and I am not willing to compromise! I believe God is raising up an army or women who will not comprise and wait for that strong man of God.. That will then allow the men to rise up and be the men God meant for them to be! Thank you Jesus!! And thank you Mandisa for this blog! Peace and many blessings!!

  49. Betsy February 11, 2014 at 9:42 am - Reply

    It’s do nice to know that there are others out there who have the same beliefs that I do. I have kept myself pure for 36 years and am planning in Jesus name to keep myself pure till I am married. It hasn’t been easy to wait in The Lord for a husband but with everything in me I believe that it is what He has called me to do. The hardest part is when friend and family members who are younger get married and I’m not. It’s also tough to see family members who aren’t believers living together and happy and they are living in sin. I’m encouraged though that Gods planning and timing are perfect and that He knows what is best for me! I so rest in that knowledge. I also have a great church family that supports me and encourages me in the midst of my waiting! And praying parents which is such a blessing! Be encouraged especially this week that God has you in His hands and has the perfect mate for you! He is so faithful and good to His children!

  50. Melody B. February 11, 2014 at 9:46 am - Reply

    It is so hard in today’s society to be modest. I have always been modest. I had with a conversation recently with a good guy friend. He says that being modest is the best thing that you could do for your Brothers in Christ ( including your future husband). He told me that even showing just showing a little to much can be a stumbling block to guys. I began praying for my future husband about a year or two ago. I know that it is hard to wait and that sometimes you want to jump the gun and go out and find your man yourself, but God is beginning to teach me about His will and His timing. I pray for my future husband everyday. Guys that are reading this, Pray for us too. I would hope to know that my future husband is praying for me.

  51. Emma February 11, 2014 at 9:54 am - Reply

    Thank you so much Mandisa. I am so excited to see you embracing the gift of singleness and being real with all of us! It is a difficult season of life sometimes, but if there is anything that I am learning, it is that I need to remember that a marriage will never satisfy me like my Savior Jesus! One day marriage will be a beautiful blessing, but it wont give me purpose. I am twenty-one and have not been in a relationship yet, but I trust in Jesus and know that He is molding me into the right person. Love is about being selfless and pointing the other person to Jesus. A male friend of mine said it beautifully, “I know the girl will be right when I see Jesus, not her.” I think it is easy to get caught up in what makes us happy, but it is important to keep our eternal focus and know that we want the man that we can minister with and further the kingdom of God with. Having this perspective means that I do not settle, I strive for purity not only in my actions, but in my heart. It comes down to trust, do we trust that God has our best in mind? I pray that we can all be women that live in the perfect love of Jesus that drives out our fears and insecurities of singleness and joyful embrace this sweet season of our lives.

  52. Suka February 11, 2014 at 9:55 am - Reply

    I am so grateful that God has placed you on this earth to shine the way you do Mandisa! You are beautiful living example of what I have raised my own daughter to be. I am a woman with three, yes three, divorces under my belt. Of course I spent a LOT of time beating myself up about that but I can’t be dishonest about my past if I expect myself to believe that I deserve a better future!
    After I divorced my daughter’s father I vowed to myself and my Savoir that I would keep myself for my next husband. That was a little over 12 years ago! Most men I have met or dated since then aren’t very receptive to my decision. They try to tell me that I’m not going to find a man that will wait but God has already told me that’s how I will tell the right man from the not-right-now man.
    I have many prayers and much respect for those traveling down the “waiting” road. I know it will be worth it for all of us!
    For now, Jesus is the right man!

  53. Stephanie February 11, 2014 at 9:59 am - Reply

    I wanted to sort of share my story of being single for 41 years, never married. I had been molested as a child and raped in my 20’s. I really did not know what I wanted, but was terribly afraid of any type of relationship with a man. I didn’t have my first boyfriend until my mid 20’s. I dated after that, as that boyfriend cheated on me.

    Later in my thirties, I had an old roommate who had gotten married and kept trying to fix me up with a guy her husband worked with, as I had my requirements, and he fit most of them. I kept saying no. Eventually, I said yes to meeting him as JUST Friends. When I found out that they did not say tell him, I made sure that it wouldn’t be anything. I met at their house and from there we went to another couples house that they worked with.

    My old roommate was mortified that I did not wear any make up, nor did I dress up. In her eyes, I did not look so hot, so when he got there, she tried to fluff my hair and then told him that I made the dinner. I told him the truth, “I did not”. All I did was stir the noodles for the chicken parmesan.

    Later in the month, we did go out by ourselves as just friends. I informed him upfront that he was paying for his and I was paying for mine, as he was Not going to get anything after.

    We were just friends for 2 years. We dated for 2 years and now we have been married for almost 5. He tells me that my honesty was apparent from the beginning and refreshing and he was intrigued, even though he wondered why I had not dressed up at all. He said that letting him know from the beginning, even though he had no intentions, that I was only interested in friendship, let him know where he stood.

    I wanted to let others know that If you let God lead you in your life, He will send you the right person at His perfect timing, and it won’t matter what you look like, or what you wear. That person will love you, inside and out. If you have to wait like I did, then let me be the first to tell you, the wait is worth it.

  54. Joy February 11, 2014 at 10:01 am - Reply

    You are so right, remaining pure can be really hard some days. I do know that God forgives when we ask Him to. I know God has the right one for me, I just need to focus on God and when the time is right he will come. Thank you for writing these blogs, they are helping me understand some things.

  55. Rachel February 11, 2014 at 10:02 am - Reply

    Mandisa, I love reading your blogs this week. You are truly an inspiring role model. This helps me feel more at ease about waiting to find that right one, and now, I know better how to prepare myself in the wait. Also, thank you for reminding me I am forgiven for the things I’ve done.

    Now, since I have decided to make a real true life change, I have things better laid out for me so I know how to move forward in my walk. I believe God wanted me to see this for a reason. Mandisa, you are such a blessing.

  56. Mary February 11, 2014 at 10:08 am - Reply

    Thank you, I’m so glad I saw this post today. I want so much to be able to wait for my godly husband. I’m divorced and have been so lonely. Please help me pray for the one to come into my life for me and my kids, an example of a godly man, and to have the patience to wait and be happy waiting!

  57. Stephanie February 11, 2014 at 10:17 am - Reply

    Wow. Your post today really spoke to my heart. I’m 22 and have never dated, mainly by choice. I feel as if I’m not yet ready to even have a relationship, let alone get married, so why should I be in a hurry to have a boyfriend? In some ways, Valentine’s Day has always been a let down, especially as I have gotten a little older and I see good friends or family members in relationships, engaged, or married. In fact, just around Christmas, 6 of my Facebook friends got engaged, one after another. It made me wonder if I was doing something wrong to be alone. BUT, I realized that my heart and life is just not ready for a man yet. God is still working on my rebellious heart, and I often find myself doing things in contrast to what He wants from me. I’m still working on becoming 1) the woman that God wants me to be, and 2) the woman that is worthy of a godly man. You know, several years ago, I wrote a letter to my F.H. that I’ve long since lost. I guess that over time, I just felt as if it would never happen and so I discarded it (I regret that, to be honest). That being said, I appreciate having someone like you who is single who is making the most of her single time. I get strange looks or comments from people when I say I’m 22 and have never had a boyfriend. I get strange looks when I tell them, “that’s not my first priority in life!”. Our culture is so obsessed with relationships and ‘love’ and sex that someone like you is considered an oddity. It’s always refreshing to know of someone else who is fed up with our culture’s view on sexuality, ‘love’, relationships, and body image! Modest IS hottest, because it’s what’s hidden that is the most intriguing, not what is hanging out. I’m sure I’m considered VERY odd because of my modesty standards, but I feel as if I have a personal responsibility [on some level] to protect the Christian guys around me, married or single (yes, while they are responsible for their own thoughts, I think we as girls/women have the power to induce such thoughts, and so we should be responsible in our dress in order to help them guard their own hearts and thoughts).

    Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU for taking the time to share with us your heart on this issue. I’m really looking forward to the next few days’ posts, especially as we approach Valentine’s Day.

  58. Ingra February 11, 2014 at 10:24 am - Reply

    This is so encouraging! I sometimes feel like I’m alone in this but this blog (& the comments) have been SO helpful! I am 28 yrs old & still a virgin. Coworkers and people I know look at me as if I’m an alien when I say that! Lol I have my struggles and need God EVERY day but I know one day it will be so worth it. Thanks SO much Mandisa for doing this! I have to say I’m not totally dreading Vday like I usually do!

  59. Michael February 11, 2014 at 10:25 am - Reply

    Mandisa, I am not likely your usual listener/fan. I say that because I am 54 and married with kids ranging between 2 and 21. Having said that, I have followed your music and your life as much as you have posted online and whatever I could get my hands on to read. You are an incredible woman of God and I know that one day you will be fulfilled in that area of your life as well.

    As for now, you have been able to do so many things and have ministered to thousands. As I have said I have listened to your music since the beginning of Idol. This past week I pushed myself out of my comfort zone and posted your overcomer song on her facebook page, she had just spend a week in the hospital after having found three lumps. It’s a young lady that I worked with several years ago, she in turn replied by saying that she hadn’t seen or heard the song, yet sat their crying while she watched it for the first time.

    This would not have been possible if not for your example to step out of your comfort zone and your time and talents being used for HIS glory. What you have accomplished is greatly in part to your singleness and I and no doubt many others want to thank you for following His calling on your life.

    You are a treasure, His treasure.

  60. Likesha D. February 11, 2014 at 10:25 am - Reply

    I love that you are taking a week to celebrate Love and the Single Life. I’ve recently started praying for my future husband too and focusing on God’s will for me until we meet. You are so right in saying our society tries to condemn a life of purity and modesty. It’s so refreshing to have people trying to engage all people, especially the younger generation into living the way He intended. Thanks for blessing us with this word. I would encourage other singles to go take their friend who aren’t in relationships and do something Valentine’s Day or weekend and enjoy themselves. I never understood the depression that seeps in around 2/14, because I believe in showing love each and everyday to my family, friends and strangers. I would suggest for those who are having a rough go, to go do something for a complete stranger and keep your eyes off yourself ๐Ÿ™‚ You’ll be making this world a brighter place and don’t fret 2/15 is better than 2/14 anyway….all the chocolate will be half off ๐Ÿ™‚ <3

  61. Heather February 11, 2014 at 10:26 am - Reply

    lol I didnt know you were doing singles week I deemed it singles week myself since everyones talking about their valentines and stuff and Im still single ๐Ÿ™‚ I love it thanks so much Mandisa

  62. Teddy February 11, 2014 at 10:26 am - Reply

    Being single has been tough for me. My first relationship lasted for 3 years and every relationship after that failed. I felt like there was no hope, but then I turned to The Lord for guidance and strength. I have been single for 5 months now and everyday I look up to The Lord knowing that he will keep me strong and protect me from temptation. It has been hard not to go to the nearest girl and try to go out with her but I must say with the Lord’s help I am very happy, right now. I know The Lord has someone very special for me and that day will come when we meet and start new chapters in our books but for now is has been all about patience and trusting in The Lord.
    Praise Him!

  63. Heather February 11, 2014 at 10:32 am - Reply

    Unfortunately I am not pure. I regret it with every fiber of my being. What makes it worse is how such of a bad role model I was to my sister. I have renewed by purity vow with God and have kept it for several years and will continue to do so. And prayed for forgiveness. The hardest part for me is to forgive myself and to let it go and let God! ๐Ÿ™‚

  64. Titus Eldredge February 11, 2014 at 10:37 am - Reply

    Another great read. Thank you Mandisa for taking the time to talk about a purity. I to pray for my husband and I know God has one for me. I just have to wait on his time. Can’t wait till tomorrow’s read. Thanks again for sharing. Have a great and blissful day.

    • Laura February 11, 2014 at 12:33 pm - Reply

      What if God doesn’t “have one for you?” When will we stop this madness of thinking that if we just pray hard enough or just wait long enough, God will bless us with a spouse? I don’t want to be harsh or crush any hopes and dreams, but I think we have to be willing to the possibility that we just might be single until the glorious day when we are presented as the Bride of Christ- and there’s nothing wrong with that. God can use singleness and marriage for His glory- why are we so afraid of singleness for life?

  65. Becky February 11, 2014 at 10:41 am - Reply

    I love it that there are still people out here who support purity and what it means. I’m 30 yrs old and struggle with being single many times I feel very alone and so I really appreciate ur encouragement about praying for our spouse. Thank u for ur inspiration

  66. Nayeli February 11, 2014 at 10:49 am - Reply

    Thanks for this message to the people who are waiting for that man according to Godยดs will, one person of those people I AM.
    I want to share my experience of WAITING … ha! When I was 15 I make an agreement (a ring) with my parents, this is about to keep yourself until God decide when he is going to give you your man and when that time comes that man is going to change your ring into an engagement ring and give it back to your parents (the first ring). In all my scholar education I didnยดt have any boyfriend, God has helped me to control my emotions. Now I am an English teacher and I even wear my ring. I trust in Godยดs will because is GOOD, AMAZING and PERFECT.
    My dad and my brother died two years ago but I am sure when marriage comes to my life, they are going to rejoice in heaven with my mom and me.
    So I invite you to respect the time of God, his plans are better that ours!

    When I get marriage I will invite you! hehehe

    blessings to everybody
    FROM MEXICO!

  67. Kayla February 11, 2014 at 10:51 am - Reply

    My deep down, perhaps hopeless romantic, gut feeling, is that there is a “the one” for me. I pray often for him. My prayers generally consist of my hopes for his well-being, that he is pursuing Christ with every ounce of his strength, is being refined by our Creator daily, and that he will find comfort in him during any hardship he may be facing. At the end of my prayers I ask God that He will only introduce us when we are both ready for such a relationship.

    God allows to be completely honest, which includes bringing our deepest desires to Him. He knows the man I desire, and I fully believe He is preparing him at this very moment! This gives me the encouragement I need to rejoice in my state of singleness!

  68. Sue Smith February 11, 2014 at 10:57 am - Reply

    Events of my childhood had me dressing modestly even before my walk with Christ and knowing being modest was the right thing to do. It has not always been easy though. As a child, I was raped by my mother’s friend. To make myself appear less attractive to this type of person I went through many years of dressing extremely modest (skirts to the ankle, shirts buttoned all the way up, or long pants), I also indulged in food as my source of comfort and another means of making myself less desirable to others. Through recent years I have been trying to give my life over to God and live in his Will. During this process, I have come to realize that I can dress modestly without the extreme I went to as a younger person. Although I would like a relationship with Mr. Right, I keep finding Mr. Not so Right who seems to want the specific things from me that I refuse to compromise my stand on. I have struggled at times as to whether I want to be in a relationship with someone or lonely and is it worth compromising my stand on premarital relationships to be with someone. The answer I keep sticking to is I have lots of friends and a Savior who know and love me as I am. I owe it to my Heavenly Father and my future mate to remain faithful. So, no it is not always easy, but staying faithful is what is Right for my life.

  69. Marcia Richardson February 11, 2014 at 10:57 am - Reply

    I got divorced in 2007 after 9+ years of marriage to the father of my 2 daughters. He told me in 2005 that after 9+ years of marriage that he was gay and no longer wanted to be married to me. I have not had a date since our divorce and expect to be single for the rest of my life. I am now 43 years old and can’t see a man in my future anytime soon!!

  70. Lance February 11, 2014 at 11:10 am - Reply

    Mandisa,

    I look forward to reading your blogs, even though I am a guy, waiting for the right girl to spend my life with. I know that our society has taught us to go against the purity aspect that the Bible has taught us, but I am holding true to this faith. The “S.A.D.” is a day that I dread, but have recently received a different outlook on it. This is a day that I plan to devote to myself, and study and worship my Savior on my own. This is something that I actually look forward too, but I cannot wait until I have that special Godly woman by my side on Valentine’s days to come. Also, February 15 is my new favorite holiday because it is nationwide half-price chocolate day!! Thank you for your songs and encouragement, even to the single men out there. Hope we can all find our special mate sooner, but until then, I am praying for her.

  71. Titi Funto February 11, 2014 at 11:22 am - Reply

    Wow. Thank you so much for this Mandisa! Absolutely enjoyed reading and watching. I only recently heard of Sean Lowe (I don’t watch television). I’m glad he and his fiancรฉe openly spoke about their belief and decision. May God honour their choice. Also, praying for myself and every single out there that has made the decision to honour God with their bodies amongst all that The Lord will enable us to be faithful till we get to the altar and say ‘I do’. Not by power, nor by strength but by His Spirit!

  72. Angela Vance February 11, 2014 at 11:22 am - Reply

    I so have to come back and read this in its entirety. I’m looking forward to reading others thoughts on honoring your future spouse aside from the obvious (and completely necessary) way of keeping yourself sexually pure. Been keeping myself pure all my life and waiting for the day I get married! (I’m 36…anyone know any God-loving guys to introduce me to? LOL)

  73. Ely V February 11, 2014 at 11:30 am - Reply

    I myself to have doubts of never finding the perfect guy for me and I’m only in college. I had made a promise way before to stay pure for my future husband and I have. Today’s young people think that to be in a relationship it requires more than just being with that person, and I totally disagree. This is the first blog I’ve read and it truly gave me some inspiration. God knows the plans for us, plans to prosper us, and not of harm, plans to give you hope and a future (Jeremiah 29:11), and I live by these words everyday. Now knowing that he knows my intended I will pray for my husband with hopes of him being with me one day. Thank you Mandisa, you really have inspired me through words and music!

  74. Cat Travis February 11, 2014 at 11:31 am - Reply

    I am celibate by choice now, but I am also not dating by choice as I give myself plenty of time to heal from two failed marriages. I had a discussion with my daughter about how I don’t miss sex at this point in my life. I can probably attribute that to the abuse I dealt with in my last relationship. Remaining pure at this point is easy. Staying modest has always been easy for me, I have always kept myself covered. I’m not one to go parading myself around for men to look at, I’m just way to uncomfortable in revealing clothing. My first husband complained that I hid in my clothes, and he’s right! Maybe some of that goes back to some abuse from my past, maybe some of that goes back to an accident I had when I was a little girl and I tried to cover up all the terrible scarring. I don’t know. I wear my skirts long, my necklines high, I’m not a showoff in my dress. I think it’s offensive to draw attention to men, especially during worship times when they need to be focused on God. How can they keep their eyes on God in worship when the women around them are in skimpy tops or skirts? I won’t go there, I won’t be a stumbling block to my neighbor. I’ve made plenty of mistakes in my walk, but this one I won’t do.

  75. Destiney Lewis February 11, 2014 at 11:34 am - Reply

    I thank you for your encouragement Mandisa as a 22 year old woman who has the desire to be married/and who has NEVER I repeat NEVER lol!! had a Valentine this new outlook on gives me that extra bit of hope that I needed** By God’s grace I pray for my future hubby everyday and myself that in this this special time that I am in that God will mold me into the help meet for my (M.O.G) MAN OF GOD ๐Ÿ™‚ Thank you sooooo much for the role model that you are ๐Ÿ™‚ <3

  76. dani February 11, 2014 at 11:52 am - Reply

    As a mom of three tween girls, I am so thankful for the excellent “cool” role model you are!

  77. Rebekah February 11, 2014 at 11:53 am - Reply

    I am thankful for people like you who remind others that it’s okay to be single and to simply spend time loving God while waiting on the one He has for you.

  78. Alicia Anderson February 11, 2014 at 11:55 am - Reply

    I love Gods promises over and over I’m scripture. We don’t have to worry about who our spouse will be just keep praying for them and God is pleased!!

  79. Jenny February 11, 2014 at 11:58 am - Reply

    The past few months were rough for me because I had gone through a horrible breakup with a boyfriend of 2 years. We both thought God had planned for us to be together. After crying out to God in desperation, in fear of being single again he healed my broken heart. One night God just lifted away all the pain I had been enduring and suffering. God has played a HUGE role in my life since that night. I pray for my future husband every single day. I act as though he is around me (and Jesus) all the time. Because I know that whatever I do, I should be able to do it in front of the two loves of my life and not disappoint them. I even got a little journal and started writing love letters to my future husband. I dress modestly. I dig deep into the word daily. Most of all, I am letting God build me up and prepare me for the day that he has planned to introduce me to my future husband ๐Ÿ™‚

  80. Dinecia February 11, 2014 at 12:08 pm - Reply

    This is an amazing post and you inspire me so much! I told my friends the other day that I’m “officially adding ‘meet Mandisa’ to my bucket list”. I love your honesty and your love for our Lord. In a lot of ways you remind me of me and encourage me so much. I would love to sit down and talk about life with you!

    I spent last night talking to one of my friends about your post yesterday, shared a couple of your songs and a bit of your testimony with her. She doesn’t listen to a lot of Christian music and had never heard of you. She loves you now! We committed to reading Mandy’s first book together and will be getting the second when it comes out.

    I am 28 and have never had sex or have never had a serious romantic relationship. I’ve never “kissed a boy” nor have I been on a real date. Sometimes I’m ashamed to admit it. I’ve had opportunities BUT I choose to honor God in all that I do. If a dating relationship or being involved with a guy is not pleasing I can not allow myself to do it. If it’s not God’s will I can’t. SURE temptation is there and it’s easy to give in but, I chose to honor God and my future husband by remaining pure. Many people look at me strange or think I’m crazy but, I’m ok with that.

    They’ll just have to look at me crazy. God has, is , and will CONTINUE to knock my socks off by blessing me with a great life as a result of His love, and His and my faithfulness to our relationship. He is faithful and is a rewarder of them that diligently seek HIM!

    Prayers for you my sister!

    I actually wrote a blog post about it a couple of weeks ago. ๐Ÿ™‚

    • Sharon February 11, 2014 at 2:34 pm - Reply

      Dinecia,
      Thank you for your testimony. I am 29 and have also never been kissed. I face people telling me there is something wrong with me in the work place and in school (I went back to school). I actually never had a real date. It’s really hard when people treat you like a freak but the battle gets easier knowing other people have the same goals and determinations. Thank you!

  81. Denise February 11, 2014 at 12:18 pm - Reply

    Hi,

    Thank you Mandisa for being so thoughtful enough to share this week. It is very true what you say. Honoring God and Honoring your future spouse. I have been liking someone after being a member for a year of my church and have been liking him now for about maybe 5 years now. He is in the things of God, serves at church, and very involved in his ministry. The first time I saw him, never did I think I would like someone like him but God began to allow me to see him differently despite his flaws (I mean who doesn’t have them.) I found myself liking him more and more throught the past years. We are both in the same ministry and we talk only about ministry and church related things but nothing beyond that. He has been through very though times and recently realized the importance of praying for him. I spoke to my pastor about liking him and she said just to get to know him as friend, I’ve tried but he seems entirely busy (which is a wonderful and inspiring don’t get me wrong) You can see how in love and the passion he has for God.) I truly admirer his dedication to the Lord. There were moments when we would look at each other. I would think that if we did’nt like each other we would conversate a little more but maybe that is all me. I’ve had dreams about him in regards to courtship. I am not sure if he is “the one” but I know one thing that I will do and that is keep praying for him; his relationship with God to grow, God’s preparation, for him, for his family and friends etc. It brings such a joy to my life knowing that God holds our lives in His hands, afterall we are here to give glory unto God for what He has done, is doing and will do!-Denise

  82. Laura February 11, 2014 at 12:29 pm - Reply

    I love having role models such as yourself to look up to. My only problem is when we repeatedly say things like “for my future husband” or “when you get married” etc. Why do we often overlook the fact that some of us just might remain single- forever- and there’s nothing wrong with that. Don’t get me wrong, I love reading your posts, and I would thoroughly enjoy the CD and t-shirt, but I just wish we would focus more on the “what if God never calls me to get married” aspect, too.

    • Mandisa February 11, 2014 at 12:50 pm - Reply

      You are absolutely correct, Laura. I refer to my future husband only because I feel like God has called me to marriage one day. I believe it is a desire He has placed in my heart. Some are called to be single, like my friend Luci Swindoll. I, however, don’t believe that I am. For anyone who is though, you are right. I will try to be more sensitive to that.

      • Stacey Brown February 11, 2014 at 10:14 pm - Reply

        Mandisa,
        I love your reply to this comment. I believe God honors the desires of our heart. I love that you are there to encourage us in our singleness and desired to be married.
        I am divorced which crushed me when It happened.
        I believed I would be married forever. What attracted me to my ex husband was his same desire to marry for life.
        And I am believing God will honor my purity to be married and that it will the marriage that will be awesome.
        It will be one that I can praise God and say, It was worth the wait.

    • Pilar February 11, 2014 at 5:10 pm - Reply

      I also believe that Christians talk about future husband or wife because in the bible says that God will provide a suitable helper and the two will become one. The Christian point of view is that none of us are to be single this is base on the scripture in Genesis 2:24 and Mark 10:8 – I personally think that God does not want us to stay single, I believe is our own choice, like Paul did in 1 Corinthians 1:7–What I am trying to say is that God can decide for us if He wants to but He is leaving us to choose. What I know is that Him will find a man/woman after His own heart for our own good and to fulfill God’s calling in this life together. Whatever a Christian’s decision might be in regards to be married or not God will honor that. Be bless :o)

    • Bessie Hicks Hall February 11, 2014 at 8:46 pm - Reply

      yes! you right to the point that some of us will remain single, if that is our desire, I don’t know how good a Bible believer you are, but I believe all Scriptures. and St Mark 11:24 says What so ever things you desire when you pray believe you receive, and you will have what ever you ask of God. Psalm 37:4 says delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart, so it is God’s will to give us our desires, as long as it according to His will. what ever you allow, God will allow. nothing is impossible unto him that believe, so because you don’t have the Faith or desire, you can only go as far as you believe, you have to see your self, God told Abraham as far as he can see I (God have given you. you have to see your self wit the promises of God, then believe you receive them. get into your word girl, and know who you’re and who’s you’re, and the promises given to you, we have an inheritance, we are the seed of Abraham through Jesus Christ.

  83. Brittany Brooks February 11, 2014 at 12:33 pm - Reply

    And this is why I look up to you so much, Disa! Thank you for sharing how you pray for your spouse! I am still single at age 25 (nearly 26) and of course have the desires of finding love, but I have decided I will not settle for anything less than what and who God has planned for me. I am also glad to see from this post that I am not the only one waiting til marriage and while many guys do not understand nor would many guys ever wait with me, I know there is at least one guy out there, my future husband, who will respect that decision and share it with me! Modest is most defintely hottest to the men that we want to attract!

  84. Carmen February 11, 2014 at 12:57 pm - Reply

    I loved your blog! I don’t like the way Jimmy Kimmel treated Sean and Catherine. It seemed like he was making fun of them and treating them as if they were ignorant. He was making a joke out of their choice to wait. Shame on him and he will be in my prayers! We need to see more positive couples like Sean and Catherine stand up for what their faith and beliefs are.

  85. brenda randiga February 11, 2014 at 1:02 pm - Reply

    honoring God to me isnt just being pure physically but mentally as well. i would like for God to give me a nice God fearing man and i know He will but it will only be fair if i try my best to draw close to God and be the Proverbs 31 woman

  86. Trudi February 11, 2014 at 1:07 pm - Reply

    Thank you for being a spokesperson for what has become a “controversial” subject. And isn’t it sad that we who have chosen to remain chaste are made to feel like we are weird, as if all of our problems stem from frustration. I say, I don’t have nearly the problems as women who haven’t upheld purity! (Although, purity must begin in the heart and mind, and thus, it’s not easy…but God is able.)

  87. sara February 11, 2014 at 1:23 pm - Reply

    your blogs and your posts are such a blessing Mandisa. you are so encouraging. Thank you.

  88. MarySue February 11, 2014 at 1:32 pm - Reply

    This past year has been one of growth as I realize I’m not getting any younger. Even at “closer to 40 than 30,” I had found myself doing more whining and pining than praising and praying. While I would love to one day be married, my heart’s desire is to be the woman who God created me to be. And, if that is as a single woman, then I want to learn to embrace Him and fall into His arms of mercy each day. While this isn’t easy, and I fail so many times, I know His grace is greater, and that He will equip me with whatever I need.

  89. Jordan February 11, 2014 at 1:37 pm - Reply

    My friends and I have a inside joke that our husbands are deployed right now and possible with each other. I know how it feels to have a family member deployed because my brother served two tours. We long for that person to be with us not away from the things that we live for. I enjoy your posts about making sure we are Mrs. Right and not putting our full attention on Mr. Right being right here right now. The timing of everything sometimes seems that we will wait forever but God knows right when we need the right relationship. Also want to include in this that I appreciate your song Overcomer. 3 years ago at the age of 23 I was diagnosed with Hodgkin’s lymphoma after God performed a miracle in my life after coding and the original diagnosis being Non-Hodgkin’s Lymphoma (one of the hardest to treat). I went thru 4 months of chemo and 1 month of radiation. Now I’m teaching Special Education and also sharing my story of a miracle whenever I can.

  90. Eunice February 11, 2014 at 1:37 pm - Reply

    I’m honouring God and my husband by keeping myself and praying that I become the kind of lady God wants me to be and that he may use me to bless a son of God as his wife

  91. Kathy B February 11, 2014 at 1:54 pm - Reply

    In this day and time it is definitely not easy to stay pure. The world pulls us in all directions. I recently heard a sermon that has stuck with me and I am able to apply it to all parts of my life. “Focus on God”! When it comes to singleness I’m keeping my focus on HIM. He will take care of my future and I don’t have to worry about it. Thanks for doing these blog posts Mandisa! ๐Ÿ™‚

  92. Kelley Mcelfresh February 11, 2014 at 1:54 pm - Reply

    Thankyou gor having this blog .I used to think there was something wrong with me , but now I see it as something right with me I live in obedience to my heavenly father who tells us to stay pure and eait for marriage.I’m a visual learner and I had a revelation on how my heavenly father feels about me as his daughter and him as my protective father.when the one daughters suitor asked for her hand and the father had ameeting with her to see how she felt and he said he didn’t think there was one who deserved her I was so touched by that .

  93. Kimberly February 11, 2014 at 2:10 pm - Reply

    I have absolutely loved stumbling across you recently. I find your posts so passionate and intelligent. I love the platform you are on in your life to reach so many people. I am a single mom of 4, my oldest is a 16yr old girl. Thank you for pouring into me and helping me pour into her. As a single mom these resources mean the world to me, showing my children they are not alone ๐Ÿ™‚ Thanks ๐Ÿ™‚

  94. Amanda Pipe February 11, 2014 at 2:33 pm - Reply

    Mandisa…you have NO IDEA how much this blog is filling my heart. I sat in church on Sunday saying to God how empty I am and how angry I am to have been waiting so long. THIS is His answer to me thru you. THANK YOU! This post is specifically poignant because I have been living a pure life for a long time and my personal hope is dwindling…thank you for the reminder to keep hope and faith if only to please God our Creator. Also, reading 1Cor13:4-7 with open single eyes is amazing. These verses have always been the “marriage” section to me but it is so full of singleness truth…love for our future partner is so important and even love for a person we don’t know yet should be patient and kind and ESPECIALLY not envious or boastful. Thank you.

  95. Linda February 11, 2014 at 2:44 pm - Reply

    Thank you for all you do and all the inspiration you are to so many.I may not be perfect, but Jesus thinks I’m to die for.

  96. allie gilmore February 11, 2014 at 2:49 pm - Reply

    I pray God’s will in my life everyday…I also pray that He will bring my my future husband into my life that we may serve Him as a family and lead people to know Him since scripture says two are better than one…I love your music. .it is an uplifting and integral part of my daily routine as it spending time in His Word and in prayer

  97. Jennifer Fernรกndez February 11, 2014 at 2:59 pm - Reply

    Hi, Mandisa. I’ve just seen this blog you’re writing, and I have to say that… you’re really an AMAZING example and the way you think is INCREDIBLE!! Do you know something?? I’ve been (and I am) really worried about who is gonna be my future partner and when he’s gonna come!! But… I want to think like you, I mean, I want to see singleness like something good and learn to be joyful and enjoying it at the same way like I would be with someone. I don’t wanna be someone desesperate, I wanna trust in God and in His perfect time to bring to my life (if it’s that His will) my future husband. I know for sure that I’m not preparate to be with someone, and that I have to learn so much more of this life and of me!! So, there I go, learning trust in Him and learning to be joyful alone, ’cause… we don’t need someone else for being happy (only God, for sure)!!

    Ahhh!! At the same time I was writing this, it has come to me a spanish song of Jaci Velasquez called “No hace falta un hombre” (in english, “I don’t need a man”). (It is for my sisters in Christ around the world!!). So I post it here so you can listen to it: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uoxVt6Lbtuw (here you have the lyrics but they are in spanish… you can know what the song says if you traduce the song; it’s really good what it says!! ๐Ÿ™‚

    Well, sisters and brothers in Christ, God bless you A LOT, take care and enjoy this week single!! ๐Ÿ™‚

  98. Vanessa February 11, 2014 at 3:04 pm - Reply

    Thanks for writing this blog. I have saved myself for my future husband, not because it’s what the Bible says, but because I made that choice. I have friends that disagree with my choice, but I stand firm in what I have chosen. In the world we live in, sin is all around us and the temptation is there. However, when we fully put out faith and trust in God, we can live a pure life. It may be hard now, but it will be so worth it in the end.

  99. Peggy Floyd February 11, 2014 at 3:05 pm - Reply

    It us hard..when I stepped away from God..i tried to find my own way (i had been married to a man in the church and was devastated when u found out he was unfaithful) i chose ask the wrong types of men..now i am back in the church and believing he hasa husband waiting for me..i just have to be patient and wait…

  100. Ellen Partridge February 11, 2014 at 3:15 pm - Reply

    I think it is sad that being willing to wait to have sex with your future husband or wife is so estranged to our culture that Kimmel asked for a lie detector test because he just couldn’t fathom it.
    I honor my future husband by not dating just to date. I have only ever had one boyfriend and we never even kissed. I want to be sure that whoever I date I date because I could see myself spending the rest of my life with them. It also keeps me for having multiple relationship baggage into my future marriage as well as honoring anyone I may date by treating them with the respect that I hope girls who may be dating my future husband are giving him.

  101. Maria February 11, 2014 at 3:43 pm - Reply

    Beyond years of grief, hatred and bitterness, God has been gently removing away all these lies and layers, that Satan managed to convince me were true and kept me locked away in a small dark room, in which, I contstantly lived out my life, trying to keep myself away from all human contact as I only would get hurt. To say I trust a human being, mainly a man this point in my life, I cannot say I trust all men, but I do have a Special Buddy, in my life who has been my mentor and friend, brother and supporter, and God placed him in my life, 9 years ago. And he constantly challenges me to trust God each day more and more and his own testimony has helped me overcome many obstacles. I consider him my only human best friend, but God is always first. my scars are many but my pain is no longer as before. And I will continue on my healing journey, looking forward and not backward.

    • Pilar February 11, 2014 at 5:23 pm - Reply

      Good decision Maria to look forward. I myself can say that I am in that place too, hiding from the world, so I will not get hurt by anyone. But God make me realize that I do need people around me too, trusting has been hard for me because I have receive so many deceptions in my life as well. I can say that trusting has been very difficult to overcome. And most of the time I find myself on my own many times. I have learn to trust God in everything and this true followed me always (Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not to your own understanding in all your ways acknowledge him and He will direct your paths) Be bless!

  102. ambrosia roach February 11, 2014 at 4:38 pm - Reply

    Im a.senior in.high school and im almost 18. I struggle with the peer pressure of every high school girl has to have a boyfriend which is not true I realize God has an amazing man out there for me even if it’s when im 30. God doesn’t grant every girl with a high school sweetheart. Instead of dating every guy that comes my wy I need to just be patient and I will have the Godly Christian guy I have been.waiting for until then I am and will be living life modest is hottest

  103. Kaylee February 11, 2014 at 6:02 pm - Reply

    Thank you Mandisa for giving such encouragement and inspiration for young women! I love reading your posts! Our culture leads young girls to feel that their only worth can be found in relationships. This idea is so wrong! Our worth is in God and He loves us more than any mere person ever could! Although it may be God’s plan for us to be married someday, He chooses when and who. During this time in between, it’s our job to be going about what He has for us to do. I have chosen to go against the grain if culture by leaving that part of my future to Him. You help encourage me with your posts that it is surely worth it! ๐Ÿ™‚

  104. Laurel Wycoff February 11, 2014 at 6:06 pm - Reply

    Thank you so much, Mandisa, for sharing your heart, not only in song. You are encouraging me as I contemplate my singleness, that I am more important to our Creator than to any man who thinks that just because I’m divorced that I must desire a sexual relationship. I want to keep myself for the future husband God may have for me; I am waiting for God’s plan and will, whatever He may have in store for me.

  105. Valerie February 11, 2014 at 6:29 pm - Reply

    I have been single now for almost 11 years. I have made many choices in my life that were not part of God’s plan and I am humbled and blessed by all that He has given to me in spite of my stubborn and rebellious nature. How much more would those blessings be if I had followed God’s plan for me? I am so grateful for His grace and mercy when I deserve neither. I am waiting for God’s leading now, whether it is to remain single for the rest of my life or whether He will send someone to share the final decades of my life. I count it all joy that I have this time to follow and praise Him!

  106. Kate February 11, 2014 at 6:32 pm - Reply

    Being high school, a lot of people don’t understand why I don’t date even though I’m always open to talk about it. I’m 16 and have never dated. I want to save my first kiss for my wedding day and wait for sex for marriage. Being called “crazy” doesn’t scare me. I don’t want to live with regrets and heartbreaks when God has much greater plans for me; He has everything under control. During these years of singleness, I can grow in the Lord and work on my heart. I was reminded yesterday of how Paul was so strong being single and so bold about his faith. God has blessed me more than I can believe; what more can I do but live my life to glorify Him?

  107. Melanie February 11, 2014 at 6:45 pm - Reply

    I am not sexually pure. As a result, I am facing consequences both emotionally and physically. I have a trail of broken relationships and a viral infection I will never get rid of(not HIV). I regret being selfish and not following God’s plan. If you have never had sex or been in a relationship, you are not missing anything! Don’t compromise yourself for anyone. It’s not worth it!

  108. Bethany Jackson February 11, 2014 at 7:18 pm - Reply

    I truly think it is so awesome that you and Jaime and Mandy are so open about being single! You know for so long I thought I needed a man to be complete. You always hear people talk about their better half or their other half. But in reality, we are completed in Christ! Our future husbands aren’t our completion, they compliment us, they are our equal. I will be 24 years old on the 24th of this month and I have never had a boyfriend. Dating was just never my thing, but so many people told me I was ridiculous and that I would never meet someone if I didn’t date. But I just have always felt like I was supposed to wait. I am still waiting and praying for my future husband! And i know that God is faithful and he always meets us in our needs . Until then, He is my love and I want Him to lead my dance and when it’s time, the only man who can step in is His chosen son!

    This is one of my most favorite quotes: “a women’s heart should be so lost in God, that in order for man to find her, he must first seek Him.”

  109. Faith February 11, 2014 at 7:49 pm - Reply

    yes this so true i do not trust men but i know that God can heal me and take all the scares and pain and hurt God bless you sister…

  110. Natalie February 11, 2014 at 8:20 pm - Reply

    Thank you for the encouragement this week! It isn’t easy being single during this time of year, but God has a plan! I have been honoring my future husband by praying for him the last few years. Purity is a hot-button in society right now. It is so sad to see people giving their bodies away to others so easily. It is not God’s plan!

  111. April McClucas February 11, 2014 at 8:32 pm - Reply

    I have kept myself sexually pure, but it has honestly been one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. I have been in several relationships where once I tell them that they get “scared off” and walk away. I know that they have not been the one God has for me and if they are willing to walk away when they hear that about me that they aren’t someone I want in my life anyway. And I know that I deserve better, but in the moment, it’s hard to see all of that. And even though all of those things are true, it still hurts. I just try to focus on the fact that when I do meet the one God has for me that he will accept me for this and respect me even more knowing that I waited for him!! How exciting will that be!?!? Our first night together will be so worth the wait!!!

  112. Sierra February 11, 2014 at 8:51 pm - Reply

    Thank you Mandisa for the encouragement during this week. I am nineteen years old and I have never had a serious boyfriend. I know that I am still young but I have been struggling with the fact that I am single. I pray for my future husband often and I have vowed to stay pure for him. I recently met a guy that loved The Lord and had every quality that I look for in a husband. We dated for two weeks before he ended it. I was certain that God brought us together, so I was very confused when it ended so soon. I know that God will bring the right guy into my life when it is the right time and that time could be years from now. Your posts, as well as your song ‘Praying For You’, has really encouraged me. I am praying for patience while I wait for my future husband to come into my life. Until then, I’ll be a single pringle and focus on growing closer to God so that I can become the kind of a Godly woman that my future husband deserves. ๐Ÿ™‚

  113. April Smith February 11, 2014 at 8:52 pm - Reply

    Thank you ladies, so much! Looking forward to spreading the word to my nieces through a cool message…Modest is Hottest! lol. Love it! What a great way to begin a sometimes difficult dialogue.

  114. Chynna February 11, 2014 at 9:36 pm - Reply

    I’ve really enjoyed reading your blog! I also pray for my “future husband” who ever he may be. I know that God has someone picked especially for me. I pray that he will continue to grow in his walk with God so that he can be the spiritual leader of the family that God intends him to be. I also take advantage of this single season of my life to grow closer to God myself. Great blog! Much love to you all!

  115. Katye February 11, 2014 at 9:36 pm - Reply

    Thank you so much for your openness and encouragement Mandisa! I have to say that your song about praying for my future husband has encouraged me to be more faithful in that area. Just as we as women have struggles, our “future” mates have struggles as well. I also have found when I talk with my youth girls I let them know they can start praying for their mates as we’ll-they’re not too young! Also, I do wear my purity ring as well and it has been used many times as a way for me to share my faith and a way for me to encourage others! Modest IS Hottest!!!

  116. Lisa Richards February 11, 2014 at 9:51 pm - Reply

    Yeah, Day two! I feel special, it’s like getting my own valentines card just reading ths blog. My future husband will be a Christian, living a Godly life. I am praying steadfast for God to send me a partner. I am learning from God how to be a Godly wife.

  117. Lynne February 11, 2014 at 9:52 pm - Reply

    I remember sitting around a table full of ladies a few years ago with you, Mandisa. It was early February, very close to Valentine’s Day. We were the only two single ladies representing that day. (Holla!) You have been such an example for me and so many other single women out there, so thank you!

    I, too, pray for my future husband. I have so many hopes and dreams as far as the kind of man he will be, and I turn those over to God and pray that He will bring the right man to the well, at the right time. The older I grow while still single, the more I learn, and the more excited I become about the love story God is writing even now.

    I would sum it up with purity, prayer, and passion. I’m looking forward to the day when God reveals my future husband to me, but until then, I’m livin’ it up for Jesus!

    Love you, Mandisa! Happy Balumtine’th Day! ๐Ÿ˜‰

  118. Charity February 11, 2014 at 9:55 pm - Reply

    I thank God that he has kept me pure. About 10 years ago I walked away from God, obviously not a good thing to do, but even worse when you are newly 21 and just got out of a very legalistic Christian college. I started seeing a guy, and while I won’t go into his faults, I am thankful that God forcibly kept me from making a mistake with him. I regret dating him, and the time i spent with him. I can only imagine how I would have felt if I had given my purity to him.

  119. Kerry February 11, 2014 at 10:18 pm - Reply

    Thank You so much for doing this week for us singles. You are a beautiful women and an awesome singer. Thank You for helping me to see how I need to change my thinking. I am a divorced mom of one and my loneliness has been creeping in a lot lately and your words are helping me so much. God Bless!

  120. Erica Morgan February 11, 2014 at 11:21 pm - Reply

    Dear Mandisa,
    I am 23 yrs old and I’m still waiting for my future husband. I go to church so I want a good hard working Christian man and like your song says mandisa I’m praying for my future husband by me being a Christian I wanna stay pure so he and only he can have all of me. Thanks for your songs and for your singles appreciation week. ๐Ÿ™‚

  121. Amy February 11, 2014 at 11:27 pm - Reply

    I bought myself a ring a little over a year ago that has a cross set into it. I wear it on my left ring finger as a symbol of my commitment to God and my future husband to remain pure until marriage.

  122. Elizabeth Courtright February 11, 2014 at 11:34 pm - Reply

    Thank you Mandisa for your inspiring words for us single ladies!i didn’t grow up in church, but during my junior year of high school my best friend asked me to come to youth meeting. I gave my heart and soul to lord that night 15 years ago. I have been blessed with the amazing strength to stay pure for my future husband! At the age of 32, I have been the bridesmaid in lots of weddings and most of my girls have found their mate. I will not say it is easy and that temptation isn’t there because it is quite the opposite. It is through Christ grace and word that I stay pure! Thank you for your song praying for you…I first heard that song coming home from a visit with my mom! I went to college and thought for sure like my friends I would find him, but I didn’t! It was my junior year of college and I came across a book when God writes your love story by Eric and Leslie Ludy! In it they discuss giving the pen to God all of your story and finally letting him write it! I began praying for my future husband and like you I pray for him though I have no idea who he is or what he is like. I also started writing him love letters and these letters I will give to him on our wedding day! Thank you once again for your music, your heart, and your willingness share being single.

  123. Lesly V February 11, 2014 at 11:56 pm - Reply

    I love the idea honoring God and my future spouse. I am in the unfortunate place of being at the end of a marriage by choice of him. I was left no option. I was heartbroken by the rejection. I am actually one week away from the final hearing for the divorce. But GOD. He is so faithful. He has brought me through so much in the past 2 years since life fell apart. He has done some major surgery in my heart, working on identity, rooting out fear. He has put hope in my heart that there COULD, in fact, WILL be a future husband. Maybe I know who that is…or maybe He has given me a promise that there will be someone through showing me a person who is a worthy man. Either way, He has given me hope, and I am praying for that future. Specifically, for the future that God has…because I want what God wants. And I want God-more than anything. I want Him to be my focus, and He will bring the gift of a husband in His timing. I want to be patient while I wait, and let Him continue to work in me during that time. I want my Joy to be in Him…not in a person, idea, dream, thing, etc. I want to honor God through a life poured out in worship to Him.

  124. Lesley February 12, 2014 at 12:02 am - Reply

    I am 42 years old and have and will continue to save myself for my husband. My dream as a girl growing up was to be happily married by the age of 20, and have children. Obviously, God had other plans. I have always prayed that God would send me the right one, and there are times when I have seen God answer my prayer by keeping me from the wrong one. I work with so many young people who I encourage to not settle for less than what God has for them. And the whole time I’m encouraging them, I’m wonder if they’re afraid they’ll end up like me. I trust that God uses me as I tell them is better to want what they don’t have than to have what they don’t want. And I know that when God does send me my happily ever after, I have an even greater story to share! I will always believe he is worth the wait!

  125. Rebecca February 12, 2014 at 12:29 am - Reply

    Mandisa, I am LOVING this series this week. I’m currently in college, and I truly believe that the pressure has never been worse for those of us committed to celibacy. I do prefer that term over “purity” – I think that’s quite a loaded word for many people, especially the implied judgment of being “impure” or “spoiled”. However, whatever you choose to call it, this path is a very tough one to walk.

    When I was in high school, I often lamented my lack of a boyfriend, and especially the lack of datable guys. I live in a pretty unchurched area of the country, so most of the guys I knew were some version of atheist/agnostic. The few Christian guys I did know were either total wimps who could barely speak two words together, or were not very serious about their faith. I prayed so very hard for God to send me the right guy, and quickly. I thought I knew exactly what I wanted in a relationship, and I thought I knew myself very well and I was approaching everything from the right angle, for the right reasons, etc, etc.

    Now I look back and laugh. While I WAS very mature for my age as a teenager (I’ve always been “wise beyond my years”), it still astounds me just how much growth I’ve gone through since starting college. My first year of college, I didn’t even WANT to date because all of a sudden, everything I’d defined my identity by – my friends, my school activities, my groups I was involved in – was gone. So I let God take me on a new journey of self-discovery. I “dated” myself for several months – took walks, went to new places, and generally figured out who I really was. I lost weight. I bought new clothes in styles I’d never worn before. I slowly made new friends, and began to build a new identity for myself.

    I’ve been on a few casual dates in college, and I did date my male best friend at the very end of high school after graduation, before we left for different colleges. He was my first kiss, but he was not a Christian (although he was someone I’d known for many years and trusted). I don’t regret that relationship, because I learned a lot – those few months with him just reaffirmed for me everything I’d ever believed about dating and why I was holding out for someone whose beliefs matched mine. I was also glad to have the “first kiss bug” out of my system before I went to college, otherwise I KNOW I would’ve been tempted, and it probably would’ve led to more than I bargained for.

    I’ve never been happier than in this single stage of my life, where I’ve had the freedom to be independent and explore the dreams God has for me. However, for whatever reason, this Valentine’s Day is looming bigger and darker than any has before. I can’t quite put my finger on why, but I’m feeling more dissatisfied with my singleness than I have in a long time – even though I’m so busy I don’t know if I even COULD handle a relationship right now! I’ve also felt far more sexual temptation than I ever have. So I’m so glad that you’re doing this series – it’s helping me keep my head in the right place in this week leading up to the Big Red Day O’ Doom, and to keep returning to the fact that God has me in this place right now for a reason – many reasons. Thank you, thank you!

  126. Desiree G February 12, 2014 at 8:08 am - Reply

    I struggled with sexual sin for almost 8 years. I’m now about to be 23 have renewed my heart in Christ.
    I’m honoring my future husband now by staying far away from any kind of sexual sin.
    I’m even going to go to seminary to get a degree in women’s ministry so that I will be able to help minister to other young women on the importance of purity, the miracles he can work in your life, and helping them to live more Christ like lives, like I’m striving for myself!

  127. […] « Single Appreciation Week-Day 2 […]

  128. Jessica February 12, 2014 at 11:22 am - Reply

    Mandisa, I am a 42 yr old re-birthed virgin. I am divorced going on 7 years and pleased to say that my covenent with God has not been broken in all that time. It is doable, yes temptation is strong at first but as you learn to praise God in all times, He removes the temptation as you pray for it to he removed. I love your new prayer song to God for that special one- I pray it not only for myself but for both of my children’s future spouses. If God does not have that special one for me, I am content in that too. I have led life my way before and I’d rather lead life in His way than suffer or create pain for my children that need not be. God is all The Lord, and Lover I need…anything else is just icing on top. (Calorie-free of course!) ๐Ÿ˜‰

  129. Dani February 12, 2014 at 1:46 pm - Reply

    It is definitely NOT easy to deal with purity in this overly sexed society BUT God makes a way. I have been waiting for 30+years and I plan to continue to wait until I’m married. Yes I get teased and people make jokes ALL the time but I know what God has asked for and I plan to honor Him with my purity! I do pray for my future husband from time to time and I believe that he will be happy to know that I waited for him. ๐Ÿ™‚ stay strong sisters!!!

  130. Megan February 12, 2014 at 7:37 pm - Reply

    I am still in high school, and just stumbled upon this blog this week through Facebook. Thanks for being such an encouragement, Mandisa ๐Ÿ™‚ I know I have many years ahead to date and such, but it is hard to see all my friends have valentine’s dates while I stay home! These daily posts have been a real blessing, and have reminded me why I am still singleโ€ฆso thanks!

  131. Linda February 13, 2014 at 2:20 pm - Reply

    I, too, did not keep myself sexually pure as a teenager/young adult. In sprite of myself, I was blessed with a wonderful husband (a sexually pure man) who loved me for me and not for what I might “put out”. With his unconditional love and acceptance, I came to realize how precious and valuable I was for just being me. Now widowed (at a relatively young age), I cherish the treasure I am in God’s eyes, and know I have been made pure – beauty to ashes indeed. Should there be another man in my future, he will need to look to Christ to find me.

  132. Bethany February 13, 2014 at 6:25 pm - Reply

    I am currently being tested BIG time in my relationship. I vow to honor God daily from now on, not just when I “need something”.
    Girls and ladies remember this: Never let a man make you feel like you are only good for one thing! YOU are beautiful, amazing, talented, cherished, loved. Never EVER let someone make you feel less than any of these things!
    I pray that woman will see how much they are truly worth, and realize they are good for more than satisfy man. In Jesus’s name, AMEN.

  133. Elisa February 14, 2014 at 7:56 pm - Reply

    Thank you for posting about the events – I have emailed them and I so hope that they come to our area! It would be a dream come true for me and the girls I teach at my middle school!

  134. Jana February 14, 2014 at 11:17 pm - Reply

    I’m a single mom of three, have been divorced for about 7 years now. I have not dated at all. I’ve taken this time to heal, focus on God’s calling in my life, and find ME! I honor God by leading my children by good example in Him. It’s been an amazing journey to say the least. โค๏ธ

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